Honk on Phonics

I went to the store and got an extra pint of ice cream

I was at the convenience store last night, and I had some ice cream in my house, and I got an extra pint of ice cream. I had two giant pints of ice cream.

The job of a male ob-jen is to mansplain women's bodies to them

Here's a fun fact, though. The job of a male ob-jen is to mansplain women's bodies to them. Therefore, their job is guys on chicks. Big Cat and PFT are practically doctors.

I read Thailand and I thought China, or I said Chiland, and then I said Thailand

Heather, who would never kiss anyone in her life, kissed Colton on their one date in Thailand... I read Thailand and I thought China, or I said Chiland, and then I said Thailand.

Hank thought the word superlatives was super relatives

Hank thought the words superlatives was super relatives.

Diane Sawyer is getting canceled, not post mostly, in IRL

There's a new documentary about Britney Spears and how she was basically like the media fucked her up, and Diane Sawyer was like one of the main perpetrators, so she's getting canceled — not post mostly, in IRL.

I went 27 years and no one ever told me how to pronounce pint

I went 27 years and no one ever told me how to pronounce what you put a thing of ice cream in or a liter of beer.

Hank's greatest hits: Thailand, Ob-jen, Pint, Post Mostly, Super Relatives

What are Hank's greatest hits? There's Thailand. There's Ob-jen. Pint. Post Mostly. Super Relatives.

My worst one was island gorilla — I thought it was a lowland gorilla from the island

My personal opinion, the worst one was island gorilla... Lowland gorilla. Oh yeah. You thought it was the gorilla from Des Moines? How sick would Iowa be if there were just wild gorillas rolling through the country?

I am a phonetic reader — his name is Jacob Puddle

We've learned on the show — I am a phonetic reader. Jacob Puddle. I said Yaka Pearl. I'm seeing Yaka Patil. Either way, he told me her name.

Hank's OBGYN and Thilan — we should do a Mount Rushmore of his mispronunciations

Don't ever change. Don't read another book. That makes like Hank's OBGYN and Thilan — we should do a Mount Rushmore.

Here's a fun fact — the job of a male ogen is to mansplain—

Here's a fun fact though. The job of a male ogen— OBG-YN— is to mansplain that— I mean, how the fuck are you supposed to know that? They didn't put any periods in between the letters or anything.

Jack Nic-KLAUS rejected a hundred million dollars from the Saudi golf league

My cool throne is Jack Nic-KLAUS, who rejected a hundred million dollars to not go to the Saudi golf league... Wait — Jack Nic-KLAUS? Jack Nicklaus. He said it like— It took me two seconds to realize that's who he was talking about. Oh God, what planet did you— Billy rejected a hundred million dollars... Good for Jack Nic-KLAUS. It's fucking spelled— Spell name. Nicklaus. Wow. I've only read his name.