Takes

There is a very fine line between football leadership and pedophilia

There's a very fine line between football leadership and pedophilia... you want a coach who could pull out his penis at any given time, but actually doesn't pull out his penis at any given time. But you want that edge.

The NFL is to blame for security guards masturbating because they put hot cheerleaders on the sidelines

Why do they put the cheerleaders at NFL games if we're not allowed to masturbate to them in the stadium?... It is the NFL's fault because they kind of asked for it. You don't put hot women on the sidelines and expect us not to masturbate. A bunch of alpha males just walking around.