Takes

Mike Mitchell saved football by blaming Andy Dalton's poor play for dangerous hits

Mike Mitchell from the Pittsburgh Steelers went on an awesome rant, basically saving football. ... Where the genius comes in is he basically said it's not that hitting in the head is a problem. It's that Andy Dalton sucks at football.

Roger Goodell has lost control of the NFL if teams can refuse to wear Color Rush

If Roger Goodell can't make teams wear color rush, then he has lost the NFL... He has absolutely no power whatsoever. If the NFL owners are savaging him and just going against his wishes, the inmates are running the prison.

Roger Goodell is incompetent for not having blackmail on Jerry Jones

If you want to point your finger at [Goodell] for one thing... it's his complete negligence and incompetence for not being able to pick up any sort of compromising material on Jerry Jones... He's really not that difficult to compromise.

Listening to Tim Tebow speak for years is enough to fuck up a guy's brain

What about the fact that he [Hernandez] had to listen to Tim Tebow speak for like a couple years? That's got to fuck up a guy's brain, let's just say. Maybe start figuring out where this could come from, and we'll buy into this whole CTE stuff that you're selling us.

Watching football is more dangerous than playing football because of binge drinking

I would even submit that watching football is more dangerous than playing football because when you're watching football, you're binge drinking. You're around buddies. You're more likely to get into a fight. You're more likely to puke, pee on yourself. You get all sorts of diseases from that.

Mitchell Trubisky looks like the Jersey Shore version of Tim Tebow

If you look at Mitchell Trubisky, he looks like the Jersey Shore version of Tim Tebow. Just put that thought in your head for a while.

Roger Goodell is gaslighting fans into thinking Thursday Night Football is a good product

Well, it's called gaslighting, Big Cat, and it's actually like a thing that works. So Goodell is gaslighting us, which is awesome. He's doing a really good job of it. He's saying, you all enjoyed watching Thursday Night Football. It was a great product. And then if he says enough, I'm like, holy shit. Thursday night football was awesome.

The Jaguars Color Rush uniforms are ugly as hell

This is what Blake [Bortles] said about his color rush... 'I think they're ugly as hell.'... Just because you're wearing boiled piss colored jerseys doesn't mean that you need to say it out in public.

Peyton Manning was using inferior steroids compared to James Harrison

I think what we can clearly tell is that if James Harrison was doing steroids and if Peyton Manning was doing steroids, Peyton Manning was doing way shittier steroids than James Harrison. Those were not from the same steroid guy.