Takes

Lactose intolerance is a fake condition that everyone actually has

Lactose intolerant... that's fake. It's as fake as fake gets. No, it's fake. Everyone's lactose intolerant. If I eat too much ice cream, my tummy hurts. Am I lactose intolerant? A little bit probably. So everyone is.

The Liver King is shorter because he didn't go through the agricultural revolution

He's come for short too... Well, you see, he didn't go through the agricultural revolution. So he was, he's still the size of the early ancestor, tall for his era. You didn't go to the agricultural revolution yet.

I can turn Ben Mintz into a 'lab rat turned muscle hamster' by controlling his diet and supplements

I now have the perfect opportunity [to] control all the variables and turn Ben Mintz into a lab rat turned muscle hamster... Basically I control all the variables. Like literally he's not going to be able to eat a meal without me. I'm going to pump this guy full of creatine, get him squatting heavy and see what happens.

I would have a 50-50 shot in a fight against a full-grown elephant if I could trick it or make it dizzy.

I'm going to say elephant 50-50 shot... elephants are another case of an animal being so smart that you can trick it. So you could probably get an elephant really dizzy just by running in circles around it.

The world should move toward 'human tubes' for transportation so we never have to drive or leave our houses.

I'm ready to go as far as to say that we should tube everything. Like, we should have human tubes instead of cars. I never want to leave my house. No, just like imagine if you wanted to come to work and you just got sucked up in your human tube and spat out here.

Men evolved to nut fast to avoid being killed by woolly mammoths

From a Darwinian perspective, it's actually an advantage. Guys evolved to nut fast. Right. So we can spread our seed and be more efficient so that we don't get killed when we're like having a romantic tryst by a wandering woolly mammoth or T-Rex.