Takes

Any competent MLB team should sign Tim Tebow as a lucky charm mascot

Any competent major league baseball team would know that they need to bring Tim Tebow into their Clubhouse for their Major League Squad... He's like a walking breathing circumcising rally monkey.

Tim Tebow will be called up to the Major Leagues this year

Tim Tebow is going to get called up to the Mets this year... You'd have to be a major league idiot to not call Tim Tebow up.

The MLB should put Tim Tebow in the Home Run Derby to boost ratings

Let Tebow hit in the home run derby in the All-Star game... the bottom line is, you want a ratings bonanza, get Tim Tebow in the fucking home run derby.

I'm off the Tim Tebow train until he learns a third skill

I'm off Tim Tebow until he learns another skill... Learn a third skill. He can hit home runs and he can circumcise babies. So learn a third skill.

Tim Tebow just needs to have sex to fix his baseball issues

Tim Tebow just needs to have sex. It's gotten to that point, Tim. That's too much aggression. I mean, a bat going into the first five rows, that happens. A bat going into the second deck. That's a guy who needs to have some sex. Just come once.