Takes

Every team in the NBA would have offered Kevin Durant a max contract except for the Knicks

If every team in the NBA had the ability to offer a max contract to Kevin Durant, every single team would give him a max contract. And the Knicks. They're the last team.

Jimmy Butler's move to Miami is perfect because he just wants to be himself and doesn't care about competing for titles

J-Butt in Miami, which I think it's kind of solid. It's almost the perfect J-Butt move... He just wants to be J-Butt and... be with Mark Wahlberg... But now he's on a team that's not really going to compete, but he's going to have a good time.

Kemba Walker is a better player than Kyrie Irving

Hank, the Celtics definitely won by getting Kemba... [Hank:] Yes. [Big Cat:] OK. [PFT:] No, I agree with Hank on this take. I think that he's a better fit up there.

Wilt Chamberlain is the greatest basketball player of all time

I think Wilt Chamberlain is the best player. Wilt Chamberlain has 68 of the 72 NBA records... He got 23,000 rebounds.

Kobe Bryant was a more skilled offensive player than Michael Jordan

When I say Kobe is better than Michael Jordan, I'm talking about as far as skilled in the overall game... Kobe can do everything Michael Jordan can do, but he learned how to do it better offensively.

Dwight Howard believes he can play in the NBA until he is 40 years old

The way my body's been feeling, I could probably play until I'm 40... I do want to play until I'm 40.

Jimmy Butler going to the Rockets would be healthy because he would blow everything up immediately

Jimmy Butler gets in, and he just blows everything up. I think that's way more entertaining and, frankly, more healthy [than the Rockets' current passive-aggressive state].

Daryl Morey is playing with house money and the Jimmy Butler pursuit is his ultimate move

It's almost like he's playing with house money at this point, and Jimmy Butler, J-Butt, is the ultimate house money move.

The Lakers are going to win the title next year

Hank, I told you this, the minute that Klay Thompson tore his ACL, you told me to chill. The Lakers are going to win the title. Chill. Okay. All right. I'll chill. I'll keep chilling.

LeBron James giving Anthony Davis his number 23 jersey means it is now Davis' team

I think that means that this is Anthony Davis' team though. I think it does. If we're talking Batman and Robin, the Batman definitely wears number 23.

The NBA will never actually shorten the 82-game season because everyone loses money

You just have to remember, if they shorten the season, all the players are going to get paid less. So there's no way they're ever going to shorten the season, and all the owners are going to make less money. So it's never going to get shortened.

Adam Silver's public 'discussion' of fan ideas is just a brilliant PR move to appease Reddit

Adam Silver is a genius because he just basically goes on NBA Reddit, reads the most upvoted idea for how to fix the NBA, and then says, we're going to discuss it in this offseason, and maybe we'll make some changes.

The NBA holding their awards show in late June is a stupid move

I don't want a fucking award show on a random Monday in June. Mentally, we do as fans [care about the postseason results]. I'm thinking, of course James Harden didn't win it because the Rockets flamed out again. It's so stupid that they do it this way. They should just do it right before the playoffs.

Doc Rivers looked like a better coach when Austin Rivers was on his team because Austin was such a shithead

Doc Rivers appeared to be a better coach when he had his son on the team because his son was such a shithead that if you could squeeze a little bit of blood out of Austin Rivers, then you looked like a fucking genius.

I predict Kawhi Leonard will stay with the Toronto Raptors

I think Kawhi's going to stay in Toronto. We're going to do a Sunday night full recap of this league because we're going to tape after the 6 p.m. All these things I feel like have been decided.

Kyrie Irving is clearly the common denominator for the locker room dysfunction at his various stops

There was this tweet that was the quotes from Kyrie Irving's basically last four or five years where essentially he said that he hated all his teammates and all his coaches at every stop. Like, hey, man, eventually you are the asshole, right?

The Warriors training staff is sketchy and prioritizes the team over player health

My hot seat is the Warriors training staff. Since the Durant injury, there's been rumors about how Durant was ripshit over the Warriors training staff for kind of lying to him and telling him that the injury wasn't as bad... And Iguodala went on The Breakfast Club today, and he basically revealed himself that he had a fractured leg in the 2018 playoffs, but that was kept under wraps and downplayed.

I was 6'4" and dunking in a basketball game by the 8th grade

I was 6'4 in eighth grade. I dunked in a basketball game in eighth grade. You're Magic Johnson. You're playing all five positions. I was like, dude, this is the greatest thing ever. I'm going to the league.

Zion Williamson is the most beloved athlete in the last 20 years

Is Zion Williamson the most beloved athlete in the last 20 years? The most beloved. I'm talking about everyone loves him... universallly sports fans it feels like everyone's rooting for [Zion].

Skip Bayless will be the first person to publicly hate on Zion Williamson

I think it's going to be Skip that starts the train with it. He's going to test the waters early in the season and be like, I think Zion's going to have trouble staying under 300 pounds.

I actually like the Bulls roster because everyone fits together

the bulls actually did something i agree with baby jordan a point guard yes another north carolina guy they've drafted a point guard when they needed a point guard the bulls roster i actually like it because everyone fits

Space Jam 2 is a front to pay players off the books and avoid the NBA salary cap

Space Jam 2 is just an excuse to pay players off the book and avoid the salary cap. Palenka, he doesn't have to know anything about the salary cap. All he has to know is LeBron James' cell phone number and be like, hey, is the money good? Right. Okay, awesome. He's got a spreadsheet. Can you shave $10 million off Lola Bunny's contract and funnel it to Anthony Davis?

James Harden and Chris Paul hate each other because the Warriors drove them insane

These two guys are very outstanding basketball players... but they develop these little nitpicky things that they have to go at each other by because they're just not good enough to beat the Warriors. So now all of a sudden they fucking hate each other because the Warriors have just driven them insane.

Kawhi Leonard is definitely leaving the Toronto Raptors

Doing a parade which looked awesome... and then continually answering questions when people say like what does this mean to Toronto and he's like 'well they it's something they can build on'... doesn't feel like he's staying.

Being on LeBron James's team guarantees you will eventually be traded

If you are part of LeBron's team, this is since July 2010... there's been 42 trades if you were on LeBron's team. ... essentially, if you're on LeBron's team, it's not a if, it's just a when. LeBron will decide to trade you.

The Lakers will never win another championship because of the 'Ball Curse'

There's a curse that's been put on. ... And that is the ball curse. The big baller brand curse. LeVar [Ball] said that they will never win another championship. After trading away his son. ... It will be the worst move the Lakers ever did in their life, and they will never win another championship. Guarantee it.

Kawhi Leonard is actually more fun than the internet portrays him

Let's be nice to Kawhi. I think Kawhi is more fun than we then the internet collectively has put on him. ... The brand is very strong. ... There's nothing he can do at this point to be like, oh, my God, Kawhi's coming out of his shell.

The Raptors are the first team that can actually be called 'World Champions' because they are Canadian

I think we can actually say world champions for the first time because they are Canadian. They have stolen our trophy.

Injuries are part of the game and shouldn't lead to an asterisk for the Raptors' title

Being healthy is part of winning an NBA championship. And I hate when people do the asterisks. Being healthy is part of winning an NBA championship.

The Kawhi Leonard trade is the most perfect one-year rental in NBA history

The best trade ever for a one year guy... going all in for one year and being like, let's just do it. Let's have Kawhi come to Toronto. He might not stay... and just throw all of our chips in the middle, and it worked out.

Teams will still give Kevin Durant a max contract despite his Achilles injury

Teams are, I think it was Skip Bayless actually that was saying, are teams really going to want to pay for Kevin Durant? Let me stop you right now, Skip. Yeah, they're going to. Shut up, Knicks fans. You're still going to pay for Kevin Durant. He's still going to be awesome when he comes back.

The Achilles injury should be renamed the 'Kobe Heel'

We need to rebrand the Achilles injury. We named it after a dude that lost a war like 5,000 years ago. And we're still calling it the Achilles. It should be the Kobe heel.

Bob Myers' tears at the Kevin Durant press conference were 'guilty man' tears

I'm going to say it was more because he [Bob Myers] fucked up somehow. Yeah, those are the tears. And if he cries, those are the tears of a guilty man who's like, I need to be super emotional because I know that my medical staff fucked up by allowing him to go out there and now everyone would be like, oh, poor Bob Myers, he really cares.

Michael Jordan's 90s Bulls were much bigger than the current Warriors

They were the Beatles. It was so much bigger than the Warriors. People have no idea... They say that, I mean, I have traveled with the Warriors too and they say it's equal, but it's not equal because I've done both.

Nick Nurse called one of the worst timeouts of all time in Game 5

Nick Nurse with one of the worst timeouts of all time. He said he was actually trying to get them some rest... Kawhi Leonard goes supernova, 10 points in like 90 seconds. I swear to God, Nick Nurse called that timeout to soak it in... It's like, what are you doing, dude? You have all the momentum in the world.

The Raptors will beat the Warriors in Game 6

I think the Raptors are going to win it. I think Kawhi loves the road games. I think all this drama, as great as Game 5 was, I just have a feeling the Raptors are going to come out and just fucking kill the Warriors on Thursday night.

The NBA Finals series will go to a Game 7

I think it's going seven too... Yeah, but that's just because I'm doing the thing where I'm holding on with both hands to the hockey and to the NBA off the edge of the cliff.

Kevin Durant will play in Game 5 of the 2019 NBA Finals

I think [Durant] will play on Monday night. I really do. And it will be chaos. And it's perfect because this is like the Warriors' entire season in a microcosm.

Dynasties end with a whimper, and the Warriors are currently in that stage

Whenever a dynasty ends, you just sit there being like... Oh, they're going to turn it on. It's going to happen. And it just doesn't. History shows that it's probably more likely the Raptors will finish them off on Monday night.

Kevin Durant's 'calf' injury is actually a secret Achilles injury

I'm definitely an Achilles Cav truther now at this point. Because I think that if the injury was as minimal as they made it seem at first, he would have at least tried to play by now.

The Warriors are totally fine in the NBA Finals even without Kevin Durant

I actually think the Warriors are totally fine. I mean, that's not like a hot take, but Klay's going to be back. I think they – sitting Klay, they were like, look, we're the Warriors. Like, we'll be fine. Let's get him 100% healthy or close to 100%. ... But they know that they can win on the road.

I don't think Kevin Durant will play at all in this series

I don't think Kevin Durant's going to play this series. We've said that on Wednesday. ... I like how we're getting even further away. Like, we're going to rule him out for Game 5, the minute Game 4 ends.

Mark Stevens pushed Kyle Lowry because his 4K technology makes him think the players aren't real

He's exposed to all the finest in 4K 3D technology when it comes to watching these games live. He's probably watched games on his couch where it felt like the players were diving into his living room. So he's probably comfortable shoving at them and getting away with it because they're not real. So when he's at a game, he can't tell what's in the Matrix and what's real life.

Paul Pierce is a coward who didn't actually poop his pants in the 2008 Finals

Paul Pierce... I actually don't really buy it. I don't buy it either. I think he admitted as much that he was just using it kind of to get a headline as a joke. ... I think Paul Pierce has just waited till it's been like the tide has turned on it. And he's like, now it's safe to say this. So he's doing it. He's kind of a coward. And he's not only a coward, but he's doing it. And I don't think he actually had to poop his pants. I think he just thought he was really, really injured.

Kevin Durant will come back for Game 7, save the Warriors, and win Finals MVP

I feel like this update is going to just be the update every single game. Kevin Durant's out for Game 4. Kevin Durant's out for Game 5. Until they get to Game 7 and he comes back and saves the Warriors and wins MVP.

Kevin Durant is going to be out for the entire NBA Finals

I don't think that [Kevin Durant] is going to play. I think he's out for the whole series.

Michael Jordan is the GOAT over LeBron James because of his leadership

Michael Jordan, he has a leadership. That's the most important thing. As a player, as an athlete, you have a leadership... in a basketball game, if you're a superstar in the team, you have to lead your team.

Kobe Bryant is better than LeBron James

If you're a LeBron stan, take a moment, have a little self-reflection, and realize Kobe's better than LeBron.

LeBron James is the greatest loser in NBA history

[LeBron James] will forever be known as being absolutely great at not succeeding... perhaps the best loser ever.

Klay Thompson's hamstring injury is a huge concern for the Warriors

Klay Thompson going out with the hamstring, which, by the way, that wasn't talked about after, but that's a huge, huge injury because he went out and he looked really pissed. Hamstrings are weird, man.