Scott Boras, Mt Rushmore Of "That Guy" And The Rockets Hate Each Other

James Harden and Chris Paul hate each other because the Warriors drove them insane

These two guys are very outstanding basketball players... but they develop these little nitpicky things that they have to go at each other by because they're just not good enough to beat the Warriors. So now all of a sudden they fucking hate each other because the Warriors have just driven them insane.

Roy Williams has been a better coach than Coach K since arriving at North Carolina

Roy Williams has won more since he's been at UNC over Coach K. So I don't know what they [Duke] do.

Kawhi Leonard is definitely leaving the Toronto Raptors

Doing a parade which looked awesome... and then continually answering questions when people say like what does this mean to Toronto and he's like 'well they it's something they can build on'... doesn't feel like he's staying.

The NBA Draft is the most anticlimactic show on television

Is there any more anticlimactic TV show than the NBA draft? ... You only have to tune in for the first five minutes of the NBA draft and then you're good to go.

Brett Favre would be a better NFL quarterback today because defenders can't touch him

I would actually make the argument that the rules of the game have changed where Brett Favre would probably be a better quarterback right now. Can't touch the quarterback. Just throw the fuck out of the ball downfield and get pass interference.

Mark Zuckerberg is going to run the world and we should all start bootlicking him now

The guy who just stole the world's privacy and helped rig elections is now going to control our money... I'm going to start bootlicking the shit out of Mark Zuckerberg because he's going to, like it or not, he's going to run the world. So you might as well get on his side early.

The 'Dad Bod' trend is a total lie

Dad bod is such a lie... You love Seth Rogen because he's so funny and he gets high and he makes funny movies. That's not what every other dad bod [is]. We're dad bods because we're lazy and we're grumpy and we suck. At everything.

The MLB draft system is essentially a servitude that hurts the sport

The common theme was you get what the guy got last year, and if you don't accept it, you're greedy... So it basically turned into a servitude. And I really felt that was not good for the game because I felt we're going to lose the great athletes to other sports.

MLB draft caps incentivize teams to lose on purpose

When they put that [draft] cap in, what did it do for the game? It had a horrible impact because what it created is... teams say, 'Wait a minute, I don't want to be competitive at the big league level because I want these draft picks.' So one-third of the league says, 'Why win 80 games when I want to really only win 65 and get top picks?'

Long-term baseball contracts are actually deferment portals for the player's true value

Long-term contracts are... for the true value of the player in the short term being a deferment portal for those values that you didn't pay up front in the future years. For example, a player is worth $80 million a year... they pay him $32 million over 10 years. And then we have the public complaining that the last four years he didn't earn the $32 million when they forgot that he was worth $80 million the first four.

Baseball should adopt an 8-team wildcard 'March Madness' playoff format

My feeling is we have to make the game more competitive... we're going to create a baseball March Madness so that you have the bottom three teams. So you have five, six, and seven. Seven... will play six, one game. Then the winner of that will play team five... Then you get into the divisional playoffs. So you're going to have three days of sudden death Major League Baseball playoffs.

The awarding of the World Cup to Qatar was definitely not above board

The former president of FIFA was arrested because it turns out the awarding of the World Cup to Qatar or Qatar may not have been above board. Oh, you think? No doy.