Takes

The World Cup draw will be rigged for the United States

If anyone could pull it off, Trump doesn't care about soccer. Oh he does. He he's, he took the ball from FIFA. He's been bragging to everybody about how he got the World Cup. Make that happen buddy. Iceland is the smallest country to qualify for the World cup.

Being an American soccer fan is the 'worst kind of guy you could be'

Being an American soccer fan is like, it's the, it's just the worst kind of guy you could be. Really? It's just the most [lame]. I live in Brooklyn, and I like footy. Like, it's just like shut up, you know.

Tottenham will win the Premier League this year

Tottenham? Really? Yeah, it's their year... Man City? That feels like maybe a safer bet. But Tottenham.

Soccer is the most boring popular sport in the world

Soccer? Don't under don't understand. It's the most popular sport in the world. Yep. By far. Yep. And I watch a game and it seems so fucking boring. Like I get the moment that you get the goal is very fun. But every other moment in between it is like, when are they gonna fucking do something?

CONCACAF is rigged to ensure the United States doesn't win the Gold Cup

I join the chorus of those who were saying CONCACAF rigged. They don't want to see the United States win the Gold Cup. They'd much rather have it be Mexico.

The United States might actually just suck at soccer

So if [Pochettino] loses it's the, we might suck at soccer. Yeah, we might suck at soccer. Okay. I've been saying that.

FIFA is not a corrupt organization

Anyone that was pointing a finger at Sep Blatter and saying that FIFA is corrupt... Guess what? You're wrong. He's been officially cleared. Fifa. It turns out plot twist, not corrupt. Everything's above board in FIFA.

The Mauricio Pochettino hire is a grand slam for US Soccer

In soccer terms, it's a grand slam... It's a grand slam touchdown of a hire. I think it's safe to say that this will be a big disappointment if we don't get to the quarterfinals [of the World Cup].

England soccer is never going to 'come home'

It's not coming home. Not coming home. It's never gonna come home. It left, it walked out the door. You got empty Nest syndrome. It's not coming back. England soccer is just, it's gotta be brutal to root for.

Offsides should be removed from soccer

Offsides should be taken out of soccer. There should be no offsides.

USA soccer is back and will win the World Cup now that Gregg Berhalter is fired

Greg Berhalter has been fired yet again. We did it guys. Congratulations. USA soccer is back on the map. We're so back now. We're gonna win a World Cup.

The USMNT will never be great until the players care enough to fight fans in the stands

The United States will never be great at soccer until our players care enough to go into the stands and fight people from other countries. It just means more. That somehow a Malice at the Palace situation... these guys just fucking care about soccer.

The USMNT must fire Gregg Berhalter now or give up on the 2026 World Cup

Our players didn't play that well, but our coaching stunk. And so now he's gotta be fired. We gotta fire Greg. Now's time. If we're not gonna fire him now, just might as well give up on the World Cup.

The USMNT might just suck at soccer regardless of the coaching

Now I agree that Greg Berhalter should be fired... is there a chance we just suck at soccer? I feel like everyone just tells us that this is the best players that we've ever had. And yet if you look at it, it's like 20 years ago or 30 years ago, we accomplished way more.

The USMNT should reach the semi-finals in the 2026 World Cup

I think our ceiling is probably the semi-finals at the very best in the next World Cup... Quarterly finals in the World Cup. And we've got a good enough team. The players are good enough to do it.

Gregg Berhalter is a shitty coach

Our coach stinks. And having him get this tie against Brazil is gonna—because we are a loser country in soccer—[make people think] Greg's got the team on the right track and he's not gonna be fired... I do know that it's gonna be bad news if he's the coach of the World Cup team.

The US Men's National Team should fire Greg Berhalter

I just wanna say that the United States men's national team should fire Greg Berhalter on the record. He was fired in 2022 and then they brought him back... we lost five one to Colombia. Right. And this is... it's not gonna happen. We know it's not gonna happen, but we're still keeping 'em around and it's very frustrating.

NBA players would win the World Cup for the US in four months if they switched to soccer

If the Bucks decided that they wanted to be the US men's national team in soccer, we'd win a World Cup. No problem. Pick any sport. They'd be our best soccer player without a doubt. Give them four months.

The USMNT must reach the World Cup quarterfinals in 2026 or it is a massive disappointment.

I'm still, I'm staying my prediction that we need to make it, if we don't make it to at least the quarter finals in the next World Cup. Massive disappointment.

USMNT coach Gregg Berhalter stinks and should be fired

My Hot Seat is Greg Berhalter. Ooh. The coach of the US men's national team out. He should be out. Yeah. Hot Seat Greg. He lost to Trinidad in Tobago. Can't do that... He stinks. We brought him back. He doesn't get along with any of the best players on the team. Fire Greg. Fire him.

Messi's assist against the Red Bulls was the craziest pass I've ever seen

Beat the Red Bulls scored another or no? Yeah. Unbelievable goal. Probably the craziest pass I've ever seen in the, in the sport of football... I think it was [better than his World Cup pass].

The USWNT coach is more to blame for the World Cup exit than Megan Rapinoe

I've reached a point now where I don't necessarily blame Megan Rapinoe. I blame the coach for even putting her on the roster. That's how bad she was.

Expected goals is the biggest crock of shit stat in sports

I'm a big expected goals guy. You know the expected goals account that tweets out... how many goals you should have scored... that is maybe the biggest crock of shit stat in sports. It's like, well based on how you guys really played, you won two to nothing.

The US Women's National Team are 'entitled babies'

No, you shouldn't be celebrating like that after you tie Portugal. Zero. Zero. You only won one game against Vietnam... So act listen, you haven't won shit yet. They're entitled, they're entitled babies.

You do not want to mess with the United States Women's National Soccer Team

You do not want to fuck with the United States Women's National Soccer team. They're going for three straight women's world cups right now. And you don't wanna screw with them. They're dominant.

MLS team names like Inter Miami and Real Salt Lake are stupid

I fucking hate MLS team names. Yeah. Inter Miami... I love the entire aesthetic of Inter Miami... but it's just the team names are stupid when it's like inter Miami Ray Salt Lake. FC Sporting kc. Yeah. Gimme a fucking break.

The next US Men's National Team World Cup cycle will be a failure if they don't reach the quarterfinals.

Next world Cup. It's our year. If they don't get to at least the Elite eight... I'm sick of it. That's it. They need to get to the quarter finals. If they don't then it's a failure.

The US Men's National Team will win the 2026 World Cup because of Folarin Balogun

We got a big defection... Folarin Balogun. He's on the arsenal, he's on the arsenals and he's a striker. And we don't have a striker... so it's coming home 2026. Hell, yes. Way to go, dude.

Lionel Messi is the undisputed GOAT after winning the World Cup

My who's back is the World Cup. That game was awesome. Messi is the goat. I mean, Ronaldo, I mean, there's nothing left. Messi has literally won it all. It's all over. He's the goat. Also, no argument left. No debate.

I predict Argentina will win the World Cup final

I want messy to win so bad so that idiots who don't know Ball. Speaking of not knowing ball, like Hank have to fucking eat it. I, I'm predicting I'm predicting Argentina.

The World Cup final will end in a 4-4 draw and France will win on penalty kicks

Four four penalty kicks... I think we'll go one each and extra time... And then France wins one gold to nothing in penalty case.

Lionel Messi will choke in the 2022 World Cup

My sit is Lionel Messi. This is the time of the year... he's due for a choke in the fucking World Cup. He's not my goat. He's gonna put up a big fat goose egg in there going down.

Cristiano Ronaldo is the GOAT

Ronaldo, my goat got benched. People don't like Ronaldo. I don't understand. ... Ronaldo's the goat, Messi's great but Ronaldo greater.

I guarantee a USMNT World Cup championship in 2026

This is mission accomplished. It's a win. Anything else on top of that is gravy. We won the World Cup today by advancing out of the group stage... in 2026, that's when the boys spread their wings and become a butterfly. And that's, I'm guaranteeing personally a United States World Cup championship in 2026.

Lionel Messi is the Chris Paul of soccer if he doesn't win the World Cup

My hot seat is Lionel Messi in Argentina because Argentina just lost 2-1 against the kingdom of Saudi Arabia... maybe the biggest defeat in the World Cup, some are asking is Messi a bust? Some are asking is Messi the Chris Paul of soccer? I think it's a fair comparison at this point.

The US game vs England on Friday is a 'must draw'

So are we calling Friday's game against England a must draw for the United States? [Taylor]: Absolutely. Yep. Because it the last thing you wanna do is win lose that game. Right. And honestly... if they lose that, dear Lord that final game's gonna be something else.

Brazil is the favorite to win the World Cup

This is Brazil's World Cup to lose boys. Yeah, it's Brazil's to lose. Yep... I just think they're more balanced than they ever have... they have more talent than anyone. There's more professional players in the world than from Brazil. They, they, they just manufacture players. It's their pastime.

The 2022 World Cup will not be finished in Qatar

I don't think the World Cup's gonna finish. I think it's gonna get canceled for some reason... I don't think it's gonna be finished in Qatar... it sounds like the literal Fire Fest. I'm getting Fire Fest vibes.

Italy will win the World Cup this year

I like Italy this year... America's my second team behind. Behind Italy. I'm gonna root for Italy. I think Italy. I think this is Italy's year... Italy's just too good.

Lionel Messi is a better and more magical soccer player than Cristiano Ronaldo

I respect the amount of work that Ronaldo puts in... he's top notch pro. But Messi, I mean, what the guy has done on the field, it's magic. You don't see that in a player. And I don't know when, and if we will ever see a player that is quite like Messi again.

Michelle Akers is the greatest women's soccer player of all time

All time goats... I would say probably Michelle Akers. Yeah. She just—talk about somebody that would run through a brick wall, play on one leg if she had to, she scored in some of the biggest moments. She was definitely somebody I looked up to.

Premier League coaching and academies are night and day compared to the American system

When your kid and the academy system growing up over here in Europe, they just have such good coaching... Over here [Europe], there's just more purpose into training and playing the game. They know it better and they just understand it more than than I was taught growing up... when I was growing up to what I see over here, it was night and day.

Harry Kane is not a threat to score if he is outside the six-yard line

Harry Kane? If he has the ball outside the six-yard line, he's not going to score, not a threat... outside of the six, not a danger.

Soccer is a joke because games are decided by penalty kicks with lasers in players' faces

I said that soccer is a joke. Like the fact that your spot at the World Cup is determined by a fucking penalty kick with laser beams getting shot in your face is a joke.

It would be 'fucking hilarious' if the US Men's National Soccer Team loses by 6 goals and misses the World Cup

If the U.S. team loses by six goals tonight then they don't automatically qualify... I as a giant U.S. men's national team soccer fan, I can admit that if they lose by six goals tonight and don't qualify, that is fucking hilarious. I hope either they win or they lose by six or more goals tonight.

The current USMNT roster is a 'Golden Generation'

The U.S. Men's National Team... suck my dick Italy. They didn't make it. We did... the golden generation for the U.S. soccer team is here. I just hear people say that. It sounds so cool when they say it. So I think we can officially declare because this team is young enough. I'm just going to say, this is our golden generation.

The USMNT will get out of the group stage in the 2022 World Cup

When we make the World Cup, we always get out of pool play.

I don't believe the United States will ever be good at soccer

I just don't believe that we will win. It's that simple... I wish we were good at soccer. We're not. And I'm not gonna pretend like soccer matters in this country when it doesn't.

Liverpool is currently the best soccer team in the world

It's great just being able to walk around saying we are the best team in the world... Because we are... at the minute, the best team in the world. And it's fucking great to watch, lad.

Mo Salah is the best player in the world right now

And we've got the best player in the world at the minute in Mohamed Salah.