Takes

Fact Claim Soccer Hot Subjective

Take Slip·Jul 9, 2025·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2025-0709-15882

PFT Commenter

CONCACAF is rigged to ensure the United States doesn't win the Gold Cup

I join the chorus of those who were saying CONCACAF rigged. They don't want to see the United States win the Gold Cup. They'd much rather have it be Mexico.

The claim of institutional rigging for specific match outcomes is a subjective conspiracy theory without proof.

Take Slip·Jul 9, 2025·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2025-0709-15883

The United States might actually just suck at soccer

So if [Pochettino] loses it's the, we might suck at soccer. Yeah, we might suck at soccer. Okay. I've been saying that.

The USMNT's performance relative to other global powers is a matter of debate, but recent tournament failures support this perspective.

Take Slip·Jul 3, 2024·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2024-0703-4051

The USMNT might just suck at soccer regardless of the coaching

Now I agree that Greg Berhalter should be fired... is there a chance we just suck at soccer? I feel like everyone just tells us that this is the best players that we've ever had. And yet if you look at it, it's like 20 years ago or 30 years ago, we accomplished way more.

Opinion Soccer Hot Subjective

This is an ongoing debate about the state of American soccer and cannot be definitively proven right or wrong.

Take Slip·Dec 7, 2022·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2022-1207-2295

Hank

Cristiano Ronaldo is the GOAT

Ronaldo, my goat got benched. People don't like Ronaldo. I don't understand. ... Ronaldo's the goat, Messi's great but Ronaldo greater.

Opinion Soccer Hot Subjective

Messi won the 2022 World Cup shortly after this take, largely settling the debate for most fans.

Take Slip·Aug 4, 2021·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2021-0804-12982

The U.S. women's soccer team sucks at soccer now

My hot seat is the U.S. women's soccer team because they lost and we stink... I tweeted about like, oh, we suck at soccer now.

This is a subjective emotional reaction to a loss; the team remains one of the top-ranked in the world, though they did fail to win gold.

Take Slip·Oct 16, 2019·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2019-1016-745

I am done with U.S. Men's Soccer after the loss to Canada

Just when you think it couldn't get worse, we lose to Canada. ... I'm done with the U.S. soccer until they start fucking just doing anything. ... I'm done being embarrassed. I want them to be good.

Opinion Soccer Hot Subjective

This is a statement of personal fandom resignation, which he eventually retracted in subsequent years (as is tradition).

Take Slip·Jun 12, 2019·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2019-0612-18696

PFT Commenter

Alexi Lalas has the most smug face in national sports media

Alexi Lalas looking like a smug prick on national television. It's Alexi Lalas season, and that means that he gets to stare into the camera after every single game looking smugly like he kidnapped your dog... He's back in a bit. He's got the most smug face, I think, on national sports media these days.

Purely subjective opinion on a broadcaster's facial expressions.

Take Slip·Nov 15, 2017·Hot Seat/Cool Throne

#PMT-2017-1115-8534

USA Soccer is off the hook for missing the World Cup because Italy missed it too

USA Soccer is officially on the cool throne because Italy did not make the World Cup either. And that's like a big deal... we're off the hook, though. Because this is like the hottest chick who didn't make the ball... we can laugh and be like, no, those guys actually try, and they suck. It's not us.