Takes

Miko Grimes is actually a schizophrenic alter ego of Brent Grimes

I don't think that Miko Grimes is a person. I don't think she exists. I think maybe he's schizophrenic. He's got an alternate personality, and he tweets from her perspective. He gets to say all the stuff that he wants to say about his employer.

Every quarterback is born with a set number of wins in their body and Aaron Rodgers used his up too early

Every quarterback has a set number of wins that's in their body by the time they hit the NFL... you're born with that number, and then once you lose them all, then guess what? They're gone forever. So Rodgers won too many games too early.

College football overtime should be replaced by a coaching fist fight or Oklahoma drill

I think that if we actually just had the coaches have a fist fight, like a boxing thing. Or maybe the coaches do the Oklahoma drill in the middle [of the field]. Who wouldn't watch that?

Lions do not eat giraffes

I don't think that lions eat giraffes. No, I don't think so either. Giraffes would just kick the shit out of a lion and strangle them with their necks.