Takes

Bonobos are the greatest of the great apes because they have sex to solve all their problems

Bonobos are the goats of apes... These guys have governments made up on sex... Instead of like a group of bonobos meeting another group of bonobos, they don't fight, they just make love. They have sex for three reasons, pleasure, bonding, and peacekeeping.

There are alligators living in the New York City sewers

New York city sewer gators... they brought them home, they then saw that they were getting way too big or they got bored of them and were flushing down the toilet. They're all the New York City sewers eating giant rats. They're actually down there because it's super hot during the winter, it's super cool during the summer. Confirmed.