Takes

Pitchers should be required to finish the entire inning they enter

I actually think they should go one further and a pitcher gets in the game and they have to finish the inning. Because it would be so funny watching a pitcher just die out there and give up a million home runs.

The Astros' sign-stealing is blatant cheating and disgusting

The Astros have been cheating and cheating a lot... it's blatant cheating. There's I like baseball when there is like a little He's been ship a little this little that... but this seems like they were actually using high like high-tech cameras in the Outfield yet relaying it to The Dugout and real time... which is so blatant lie cheat ice gusting.

Trevor Bauer is a 'dumb smart person' whose antics are good for baseball

Trevor Bauer... he's a dumb, smart person. ... I think that he might be exactly what baseball needs. We always talk about baseball. We don't have a face of the game. Lean into marketing this dumbass. ... Baseball hasn't really had an asshole for a long time.

Blake Snell was actually having sex in the shower when he hurt his toe

Dude, you're having sex in the shower. Like that was a really long way of just saying, hey, I was having sex in the shower and I stubbed my toe.

Baseball writers will hold Ichiro's unannounced retirement against him in Hall of Fame voting

This is going to cost him some votes in the Hall of Fame. When he's eligible, people are saying that he might be another unanimous entry... but I would not put it past baseball writers to get upset about not getting the heads up about his retirement and hold that against him five years from now.

A ground rule double in baseball should count as a home run

I also think that a ground rule double should be a home run. Not the weird one where it gets stuck in the ivy, but just if it bounces over, I think that should count as a home run.