The Bears will draft Kyle Trask and he will be a bust

I'm calling it right now. They're going to draft Kyle Trask, and then he's going to stink, and [Big Cat's] life will be made a living hell by a quarterback who sucks that looks exactly like Billy Football.

Jon Gruden would trade his entire draft for Derrick Henry

I feel like it might be [Jon] Gruden. He might do it for Derrick Henry just because of his size. I feel like Gruden is a guy that respects mass.

Arthur Smith's family wealth proves his genuine love for football

His dad is the CEO of FedEx and he could have just been rich. Instead, he's like, I want to grind tape and be an offensive coordinator for a bunch of years and then hopefully get the dignity of being able to stand on the sidelines as my team collapses... it's pretty fair to say that he loves football.

The goal allowed by the US goalie was the most embarrassing possible

What about the goalie? Yeah, I mean he... that was the most embarrassing goal that I've ever seen. Possible.

The USMNT is the 'James Franklin Penn State' of soccer

People were making very mean jokes online that we were James Franklin, Penn State. And it is actually perfectly appropriate because if you look at who we played, we beat the teams we're supposed to beat... and then we absolutely got ass fucked by the team that was better than us in Belgium. We are not who we thought we were.

We just suck at soccer as a country and that's okay

My take is we suck at soccer and that's okay. Like, I don't care that we suck at soccer anymore. I'm going to root for the US team. I'm gonna get excited when we're in a World Cup. I'm gonna get hyped up and it's gonna be fun to watch. And then I'm gonna be reminded that we suck at soccer and that it's just gonna be like, okay, yeah, that's okay.