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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Jerry Jones is woke because he once 'solved racism' by winking and kneeling before a game.

Jerry Jones is woke. You remember you remember that picture of him kneeling? Yeah. That's an all time moment. I think in NFL history. Yeah... Jerry Jones like at midfield looking like fucking captain Morgan. Yeah. Just taking a big knee, smiling like winking at the Camry. He's like I did it. I solved racism.

The claim that Jerry Jones is 'woke' is a satirical interpretation of a specific event.

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Sep 14, 2022
#9302
Big CatBig Cat

Seahawks fans will eventually cheer Russell Wilson in a few years once the rawness of his departure fades

I think if this game took place at any point, other than this year and especially week one, it might be a little different. So if Russell Wilson plays for eight more years and he comes back to Seattle at the end of his career, I think they will cheer him. I think it's just so raw... The rawness of it, the fact that it was week one, I think that if it happens... eight years from now or say, let's even say Russ goes somewhere else... I think they might be a little bit more receptive to 'em and be like, Hey, that was cool when you won us a Super Bowl.

This is still pending as Wilson hasn't reached the 'ceremonial return' phase of his career yet.
Win
Sep 14, 2022
#9300
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Russell Wilson's former Seahawks teammates are relieved he is gone because he was annoying to be around

I've gotta take about the Seahawks. It's about the players themselves. Not having Russ Wilson around anymore. I think they're kind of relieved. Oh dude. I think that it's like a weight off their shoulders. Not having to worry about like plugging Russ in, in the locker room, making sure that his software's up to date... He made the team competitive for 10 years. And to a certain extent, you have to pretend to like a guy like that when he's in the locker room... once a guy like that leaves the weight off your shoulders is just enormous. Now you're like, oh shit, Geno Smith is a normal person.

Subsequent reporting from Seattle and Denver confirmed that many teammates found Wilson's 'brand-first' personality difficult to deal with.
Win
Sep 14, 2022
#9304
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Nathaniel Hackett's end-of-game failure happened because he has never played Madden

This is just a rookie head coach doing rookie head coach, I think. And if he'd played enough Madden in the past, he would understand exactly how to handle that end of game situation. This is a problem with too many, too many teams are hiring offensive defensive coordinators that have spent their lives on the sidelines... but have never picked up a fucking controller in their lives and played Madden. Right. If they play Madden, they know exactly how to handle the end of game experience.

While satirical, the consensus was that Hackett's clock management was objectively poor, a hallmark of his short tenure.

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The Knicks will probably win the series in five games or even sweep the Cavs

I still think that the, the Knicks are probably gonna win in five. They could even pull off the sweep. I guess the only real question we have for you, 'cause we already, we declared that the New York Knicks have won the series after game one. Correct.

The series is currently ongoing with the Knicks leading 2-0.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The NBA should rebrand the 'granny shot' as the 'pimp grip' to encourage players to use it

Nobody, no player in the NBA wants to shoot a free throw granny style. But if it's pimp grip, that sounds pretty fucking cool. Listen, if it goes in, it doesn't matter. Like if he and he would, he actually probably get some endorsements from it.

This is a comedic suggestion and not a verifiable fact claim.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I want the Thunder to win so we can love Victor Wembanyama longer before the inevitable hate cycle starts

I know who I want to win. I want the Thunder to win this series. And the reason why I want the thunder to win this series is because I think if the thunder win, we get to restart the clock on how much longer we get to love Weby before we hate 'em. If the Spurs win this series and then they win their first championship and Weby dominates, we're gonna eventually hate Weby.

The outcome of the series is pending, and the 'hate cycle' is a subjective sociological prediction.