Takes

Draymond Green is now a dirty player on the same level as Dwyane Wade

Draymond Green, he is very, very hateable now. He's now like a Dwyane Wade dirty guy where he just has all these accidents and the accidents always end up hurting someone else.

If Draymond Green was a white guy named Raymond Green, he would be more loved

What if Draymond Green was Raymond Green and he was a white guy? He might be more hated, but he also might get away with—he might also be more loved by a large collection of the audience there... if you're a white guy, you can get away with being dirty a little bit better because you just naturally look uncoordinated when you fall down... so people believe you when you're just like flopping down. So if Draymond were white, I actually think he would be more loved overall.

A team's enforcer should be an unskilled player off the bench, not a star like Draymond Green

I like my tough guys and my clowns and my bozos to be totally unskilled, and you just throw them in to rough people up. [Draymond Green] is too skilled for that. You need that guy, but it needs to be a guy off the bench who comes in and does that shit. Not a guy who's arguably your third most important player.

If you are 46 years old, you shouldn't have a Twitter account

If you're 46, you shouldn't even have a Twitter account. That's number one. Number two is now you're saying that a 27-year-old [Steph Curry] is your hero.

Buffalo is the number one city in the Grit Power Rankings

I'm ranking Buffalo number one as well. Simply because of the people, they are the best. There's no one better. They were welcoming. They came to up to the bus. They were awesome.

Indianapolis is an underrated city and a great place to see a Final Four

I've always said Indianapolis is an underrated city. Great place to go see a Final Four. And special spot in our heart for the milk puke challenge we did in the middle of Indianapolis.

The city of Cincinnati is collectively trying to prank the world with Skyline Chili

I'm convinced, absolutely convinced that everyone in the city of Cincinnati just said, we're going to fuck with the world. So anytime they come to Cincinnati, we're going to make them eat this disgusting chili and tell them that it's all we eat.

We are not football guys, we are football guy guys

Thinking back on the different football guys that we met with and talked to about grit, I came to the conclusion we're not football guys, me and you. We're not football guys, but we are football guys guys. We love being dudes around football guys.

Women's lacrosse is not a real sport because Northwestern is good at it

Also, Northwestern won a national title, and if Northwestern can win a national title in the sport we're talking about, that's not a real sport. So women's lacrosse, sorry, not a real sport.

People who camp outside NFL facilities for tryouts are terrorists

The people that camp outside of NFL training facilities holding signs that say, 'Let me get a tryout. All I need is a shot. I'm hungry.' They're pretty much terrorists because what they're doing is they're going on like a hunger strike... You can't bypass the system.

Nyquist the horse is the weakest, most sensitive horse for blocking haters on Twitter

I got officially blocked by Nyquist, the horse. I think I called him a pussy for not racing in the Belmont. This horse is the worst. He's clearly a bully horse. Either you're against horse trolling or you're not Nyquist. Weakest horse I know.

Skyline Chili is a running joke used by Cincinnati residents to prank tourists

Skyline Chili, I'm convinced all of Cincinnati has Stockholm Syndrome. I don't know what is going on there. They have convinced themselves that's real food that people should eat. I think it's a running joke. Everyone in Cincinnati was like, hey, let's try to convince the rest of the world that every time they come visit us, they have to eat this diarrhea.

Joe Thornton is wrong for playing with his kids instead of watching his potential Stanley Cup opponents

Joe Thornton, when the Sharks won the Western Conference Finals... said that he was going to play with his kids during the Game 7 Penguins-Lightnings. Not watch who he was going to play in the Stanley Cup Finals. Mike Milbury was not happy... how you win a Stanley Cup is being always focused and making sure you tune in to your opponent even when you're not playing them.

NFL players should only be allowed to have sex from May to August to ensure offseason births

I've been a long-standing fan of this policy for the NFL... I think that players should only be able to have sex through the months of, what is it, like May through August to time it so that you have an offseason baby. Because I hate it when Joe Flacco has to miss the Pro Bowl or threaten.

Bengals vs. Steelers is currently the biggest rivalry in the NFL

Cincinnati Bengals, Pittsburgh Steelers. Maybe the biggest rivalry going right now in the NFL.

If Roger Goodell isn't 'motherfucking' me behind my back, I'm not doing my job as NFLPA President

I feel like in a weird way, if [Roger Goodell] hasn't [motherfucked me behind my back], I'm probably not doing my job... You have to stump for the players.

The Steelers-Bengals rivalry in 2016 was worse and more intense than the Steelers-Ravens rivalry

Honestly, I think it was worse with the Bengals this year... just the Bengals are something different. That game was wild, man.

The Spelling Bee stinks now because it tries too hard to be 'millennial-friendly'

I'm a spelling bee purist... I kind of like some of the new stuff that they're doing to try to draw on the millennial. No, they're trying to be too cute. It's too cute. They're having the kids dab. I like the cutthroat. I like the competitiveness. I like the pressure where you know these 12-year-olds, if they get this word wrong, their whole entire life is going to be crushed.

The Arby's in Columbus is the worst fast food restaurant in America

Arby's is a questionable choice to begin with. This one particular Arby's was probably the worst fast food restaurant in America... We knew we had a problem when the guy in front of us was complaining about soggy, moldy bread that he got a week ago, and he wanted a free sandwich, and they were fighting him tooth and nail for a $5 free sandwich.

Penn State is the toughest Big Ten stadium for opponents but it looks like an erector set with no character

Probably Penn State when they're playing well is a difficult one because it's like an erector set, and it's huge... it doesn't, in my opinion, have that much character. It just looks like it got added onto and added onto another erector set.

Grit is more important than athletic ability for a quarterback

That's why I think grit's more important than ability is because Craig Krenzel was not the most talented quarterback in the nation... but he did the one thing that you're supposed to do if you're the quarterback, and that's win every game.

Fullback dives are not gritty; they are essentially a pillow fight

No [fullback dives are not gritty]. Fullback dive is kind of like a pillow fight. You just run up in there. I mean, it's either you get a lot or you get nothing because you don't get any movement. You don't even have enough running start to have a collision in a fullback dive.

The punt is the most important play in football

I've said it's the most important play... the impact that the punt play makes in the game is incredible. If you get one blocked, it's devastating. If you block one, it's exhilarating. It's kind of like a relationship.

Year-round training and specialization are 'fouling up' youth sports by preventing kids from developing grit through diverse experiences

I think we've kind of fouled up the whole thing by having all year round soccer, all year round football, all year round basketball... student athletes aren't doing internships because they're so busy training... all of the things that help develop grit, we're just doing them in one direction and in training.

No one actually likes advanced analytics except for nerds

I just want to know who likes analytics. I'm not talking black, white, Asian, whatever. No one likes analytics. Nerds like analytics. Have you ever had someone walk up to you and be like, hey, man, have you looked at the recent war that each player has? No.

A 73-win season means nothing without a championship

Don't mean a thing without that ring. That's all I'm going to say... That is the 72-10 1996 Bulls. That was their little mantra. And the Warriors... The 73-win Warriors look like they're in a lot of trouble.

Russell Westbrook is currently the best player in the world

[Russell Westbrook] had 33, 36, 11, and 11. Unreal. He basically said, I'm the best player in the world and I'm going to take over this game. I'm going to take over the series.

Buffalo is a top-tier vacation destination

I really feel like Buffalo is right up there with any of your great vacation places like Key West, your Acapulcos... Rio, all of the above. The 24 hours we spent there seems like it was the best time of my life.

I despise Cleveland Cavaliers fans

I love Browns fans. I fucking despise Cavs fans. They're the worst. I know they're the exact same people, but they're not.

I am the best-looking member of the Ryan family

I'm definitely better looking than Rex. So, yeah, I'm definitely that guy. The long hair, I think, is what makes it.

Buffalo wings are better than anybody else's wings in the world

These Buffalo wings are better than anybody's... I'm definitely making my rounds, and there's definitely a difference.

Rex Ryan is still deep down a fat guy despite his weight loss

I think once you're a fat guy, you always have it in you, that you can definitely become fatter... I think he's still deep down a fat guy. [His personality] didn't change... He's still a bad guy. He's still himself.

Kyle Orton was a damn good quarterback and a hell of a backup

Damn, [Kyle Orton] was good... He's a hell of a backup, but I think there's a coverage that I know I could play with him that he didn't like.

I would crush Rex Ryan in a wrestling match because I am too big for him now

I'd crush [Rex Ryan]. I'm huge... We had some pretty good fights in the day, usually against other people. But I'd get him in a wrestling match. I'm too big for him now.

My go-to late-night coaching meal is two Double Quarter Pounders with extra cheese and jalapenos

I always got two [Double Quarter Pounders] with extra cheese and jalapenos, but I do that on my own ticket.

Oakland is currently the grittiest city in America

Oakland's pretty damn rough right now, so I'm going to go Oakland.

Ohio State is the toughest atmosphere in the Big Ten

I would probably say, I mean, I got to say Ohio State, you know, I mean, the great atmosphere, loud, you know, I mean, and obviously you're going to play against a good football team when you're there.

Les Miles is a unique person who truly doesn't care what anyone thinks of him

He's unique, I'll put it that way. He has a great personality. He's very personable, but he's going to do his own thing. The thing about Les [Miles] is he really doesn't care what people think of him. He's going to do what he wants to do.

There is not a better human being in the world than Brett Favre

Let me tell you, there's not a better human being [than Brett Favre]. I don't know if you guys have ever spent time with Brett.

Ndamukong Suh was a great guy to coach and is a very intelligent person

He was a great guy to coach. I mean, he worked hard every day. He's a great person, very intelligent... he plays with an edge.

Robert Griffin III would have been a better safety than Johnny Manziel

Between Robert Griffin, Johnny Manziel, who do you think would have made a better safety? [Bo Pelini]: Probably Robert Griffin.

The Mets should ban the media from reporting Matt Harvey's ERA

The Mets need to send out a release to all the press people saying, you're not allowed to cover our games. You're not getting a credential if you talk about what Matt Harvey's ERA is. So just put a moratorium on bad Matt Harvey talk.

Matt Harvey needs to start partying and doing cocaine to find his form

I also think he needs to party again. He used to be a party boy... I would say either get the Mets to basically make it a rule that no one can say anything bad about you or start doing a bunch of cocaine.

Steve Weatherford is the 'Rosa Parks' of heavy breathing at Planet Fitness

He's now taking a stand about people shaming heavy breathers... This is the Martin Luther King of breathing heavy in Planet Fitness is Steve Weatherford. Really standing up for some civil rights here. [PFT]: I'd say it's more Rosa Parks.

J.J. Watt's new logo looks like a cheap energy drink and a bad tattoo

J.J. Watt. Come on, man. He basically made a logo that looks like a cheap, crappy energy drink slash awful tattoo... symbolizing buildings getting taller because his work ethic... literally no one forgets [he was a walk-on] because JJ tells us every single fucking day.

Duff's is far better than Anchor Bar for wings in Buffalo

We unanimously decided that Duff's was far better than Anchor Bar. Anchor Bar had an unfortunate incident... but we unanimously decided that Duff's was far better.

Kickers are severely disliked by real football players

I severely disliked them... as the 17th most hated person on the planet, I can't say I really hate anybody, but I severely dislike them. I would not invite them out for wings.

Dying as a champion racehorse is better than living as an old-timer in a pasture

I would say that that's more of a hurt [than an injury] because if you die a legend like that after winning a race, your legacy lives on longer than anybody else... You don't remember him as some old-timer getting jerked off in a pasture somewhere.

Anyone who supports robot umpires in baseball can go fuck themselves

Anyone who is like pro robots can go fuck themselves... The minute you start letting robots do these kind of tasks is what they're going to take over our lives... I don't need fucking umps telling me balls and strikes. There's some things you need to leave to humans.

Drake is a bad musician and generally sucks

Here's a hot take about Drake, but I truly believe this. Drake sucks. Drake is not good... There's nothing good about Drake... Old Drake, before he became a musician, was good [on Degrassi].