The Arby's in Columbus is the worst fast food restaurant in America

Arby's is a questionable choice to begin with. This one particular Arby's was probably the worst fast food restaurant in America... We knew we had a problem when the guy in front of us was complaining about soggy, moldy bread that he got a week ago, and he wanted a free sandwich, and they were fighting him tooth and nail for a $5 free sandwich.

The Raptors are the Russian Army of the NBA; they defend their home well but get smoked once they travel abroad

The Raptors, they're only good in Canada. They're like the Russian army. They can defend their homeland really well. But the second you send them over like the Kush mountains into Afghanistan, they're getting smoked.

The Cavaliers will beat the Raptors and face the Thunder in the NBA Finals

So we got the Cavs are going to win. They're going to most likely face the Thunder. [PFT: Oh, you want to get in this?] No, let's do Tressel, then we're going to get to it. I'm just saying that was a bold statement you just made.

The punt is the most important play in football

No, I've said it's [the punt] the most important play. All right, the most important play.

Grit is more important than athletic ability for a quarterback

That's why I think grit's more important than ability is because Craig Krenzel was not the most talented quarterback in the nation... but he did the one thing that you're supposed to do if you're the quarterback, and that's win every game.

Fullback dives are not gritty; they are essentially a pillow fight

No [fullback dives are not gritty]. Fullback dive is kind of like a pillow fight. You just run up in there. I mean, it's either you get a lot or you get nothing because you don't get any movement. You don't even have enough running start to have a collision in a fullback dive.