PMT DB
PMT DB
Coach O on the 2019 Tigers, Mt. Rushmore of Worst Sounds, and UFC 319
Football is so close you can practically smell the charcoal and the despair of losing a parlay. Big Cat and PFT Commenter are back to grind through the final days of the preseason, and while Week 2 is usually where the hype goes to die, we actually have some quarterback battles worth monitoring. Between the Browns and Colts, we're finally nearing some actual clarity on who is leading these teams out in Week 1.
PFT CommenterThe NFL will officially announce starting quarterbacks for the Browns and Colts this week
I think we're gonna get starting quarterbacks announced maybe this week... I think we're gonna get announcements from the teams this week of who the starting guys are gonna be in Cleveland [and Indy].
PFT has a specific theory on how Kevin Stefanski is going to handle the situation in Cleveland, likely leaning on the veteran presence before handing the keys to the kids.
PFT CommenterKevin Stefanski will start Joe Flacco to buy time while Dylan Gabriel and Shedeur Sanders compete for the future
I think what [Kevin Stefanski] is gonna do is start Flacco and then he'll continue to have Gabriel and Sanders kind of like going shot for shot. See, figuring out who the next guy Ups gonna be. Yep. And he's gonna buy himself a couple weeks by having Flacco start.
UFC 319 and the Ground-and-Pound Blues
The whole show made the trip to the United Center for UFC 319, and the experience was electric right up until the main event. While the undercard featured back-to-back spinning elbow knockouts that had Max questioning if the fighters were actually dead, the title fight between Hamzat and Dricus left a lot to be desired for the casual fan. Big Cat was particularly annoyed by the dominant wrestling that lacked any actual finishing attempts.
Big CatThe UFC should implement a rule requiring submissions after prolonged ground control
I just think that if you take someone down for 25 minutes and wrestle them, you should have to submit them... If you wrestle someone for 25 minutes, you have to submit them. Or else it's impressively boring.
Hank felt some stolen valor sitting next to Kamaru Usman, receiving winks from fighters that were definitely not intended for him, while PFT was busy noticing that every single person in the building from security to the fans could probably kick their collective asses.
Scottie Scheffler’s Dominance and Golf Tips
Scottie Scheffler continues to be a robot designed specifically to win golf tournaments. The guys breakdown his insane stats—14 wins in 33 starts—while looking ahead to the FedEx Cup finale. Big Cat is staying in his lane when it comes to the links.
Big CatI care about the PGA Tour playoffs and nothing else in golf
I'm a playoffs only guy in the PGA tour. Otherwise [Scottie Scheffler's] got nothing... if he doesn't win the finals, he's got nothing.
However, a random email from "Rob with two Bs" has the guys convinced that Tommy Fleetwood is the value play for the BMW. PFT is already envisioning the heartbreak when Fleetwood inevitably chokes away a lead.
PFT CommenterBetting on Tommy Fleetwood to win the FedEx Cup is a guaranteed loss
I believe in Rob [with two Bs] more than Tommy. I do not believe in Tommy... This is going to be a good bet because he's going to get down to like plus 300 at some point, plus 200. We'll be like, great bet. And then he's going to lose.
Mt. Rushmore of Worst Sounds
It’s the dog days of Mount Rushmore season, and the standings are tighter than Big Cat’s jeans after a weekend of Chicago food. The guys tackled the sounds that make your skin crawl. PFT and Hank went chalky early with nails on a chalkboard, while Big Cat and Zach countered with the specific horror of an alarm clock and a baby crying on a plane.
Max and Memes brought the heat with "wind buffeting in a car window" and the sound of a bone snapping during a sports broadcast. The debate devolved into whether someone being burned alive (Hank's dark horse) is worse than Tony Romo’s voice (PFT's petty pick).
Coach O in Studio
The legend himself, Coach O, stopped by to talk about the itch to get back into coaching and his time living on Miami Beach. He shared some all-time stories about recruiting Joe Burrow with 40 pounds of crawfish and getting his brother Dan to "squeeze his balls" to make the decision. When it comes to the greatest teams to ever do it, Coach O isn't entertaining any other candidates.
Coach OThe 2019 LSU Tigers are the best college football team of all time
With Joe [Burrow], I think we could beat anybody. It's gotta be won on the field. Now they've had some other great teams, but I do believe with Joe and the team that we had, we could've beat anybody we played that year... I'd put the LSU team in front of everybody.
He also gave a massive endorsement to the next generation of the Manning dynasty. After watching a Texas practice, Coach O thinks the hype around Arch Manning is more than just a famous last name.
Coach OArch Manning is as close to—or maybe even better than—Joe Burrow
Arch [Manning] is as close to or maybe as good as Joe [Burrow] as I've seen. Really. And I've never said that about anybody. I watched his practice, and I'll say this conservatively... Arch is the real deal.
Who's Back
Hank’s "Who’s Back" was England, specifically for the Premier League and the British Ambassador’s push to bring a Super Bowl across the pond. This led to a massive patriotic standoff, as Big Cat and PFT refused to let the crown take our one remaining pure American tradition.
Big CatI refuse to support the global expansion of the NFL because I only care about American fans
I honestly don't care if, if, if other countries watch football or not, like this whole, like global expansion of football, do not care. I watch football with my friends in America. I don't give a fuck what they watch over there.
The show wrapped up with the introduction of Kolten, the new vibes guy filling in while Pug is on his honeymoon, who immediately asserted dominance by admitting he wears 2XL shirts despite being a medium build.
Try not to overdose on creatine this week.
