PMT DB
PMT DB
Rob Gronkowski on Retirement, Tom Brady Rumors, and Sudoku
We have officially reached the second-best sports month on the calendar. March is here, and with it comes the constant refrain of "This is March" until our ears bleed. Big Cat is already eyeing the record books for how many times the phrase will be uttered this month, while PFT Commenter is busy reminding everyone that it's officially vasectomy season for the college basketball diehards.
Big CatI think we're going to break the record this year for the amount of times 'This is March' is uttered
I think we're going to break a record this year for the amount of times 'This is March' has uttered shout-out to our friend John Rothstein for creating that phrase.
Romo Gets Paid and the Combine Freak Show
Tony Romo is the man of the hour after signing a massive deal with CBS that pays him roughly $17 million a year. While the money is staggering, PFT Commenter is concerned about the fine print and whether Romo sacrificed his golf career for the bag.
PFT CommenterTony Romo shouldn't have signed for $17M if it means he can't skip games for golf tournaments
Does [Romo] get to skip certain games to go playing golf tournament still? ... if he's getting paid that much ... Tony Romo can't sneak away to play in like the Bob Hope program ... is it really worth it?
Meanwhile, the NFL Combine wrapped up with some absolute freaks of nature. Isaiah Simmons wowed everyone by being a 240-pound human who runs like a cheetah, but Big Cat had a moment of clarity regarding the speedsters. Sometimes being too fast is just a way to mask the fact that you can't run a route or keep your body under control.
Big CatNFL Combine speed can have diminishing returns if it's used as a crutch
I had the thought while I was watching it is being really fast actually bad. Is there a point where being so fast is diminishing returns? Yes... the faster you are the faster you're out of position and you maybe you don't run the routes as well because you can't keep your body under control you learn it as a crutch.
Who's Back: Calhoun, Dalton, and the Gonzaga Curse
Who's Back of the week featured the legendary Jim Calhoun building a D3 powerhouse from scratch at a former all-girls school. Big Cat used the moment to remind everyone that some coaches are just better at winning when the deck is stacked in their favor.
Big CatKevin Ollie is the worst coach to ever win a National Championship
I assume Kevin Ollie's still looking for a job somewhere worst coach ever to win a National Title.
Speaking of coaching and personnel moves, the Andy Dalton to Chicago rumors are swirling. Big Cat is surprisingly open to the Red Rifle coming to the Midway to battle Mitchell Trubisky for the QB1 spot.
Big CatI am ready for an Andy Dalton and Mitchell Trubisky QB competition
I am very ready for this. I would love for Andy Dalton to get in that room have little QB competition. No, but no wrong answers when your QB competition is Andy Dalton and Mr. Biscuit.
And in a rare moment of college basketball optimism, PFT Commenter is finally ready to buy stock in the Zags. He thinks this is the year they finally break through the glass ceiling and make it to the final weekend.
PFT CommenterGonzaga is finally making the Final Four this year
I want to put a take out there into The Ether real quick. I think this is your Gonzaga makes a Final Four.
Rob Gronkowski Joins the Show
Rob Gronkowski called in to talk about life after football, and it turns out retirement looks a lot like being a full-time troll. Gronk admitted he loves fueling the Tom Brady return rumors just because people won't stop asking him. He gave us the lowdown on a hilarious story where he repeatedly hung up on Roger Goodell because he thought it was a prank call about the NFL 100 list.
As for the Brady sweepstakes, Gronk didn't give away the destination, but he confirmed that his former QB is definitely doing his due diligence.
Rob GronkowskiTom Brady is going to check out all his options in free agency
I think I know he's going to check out his options. I can give you that much. Okay. Well ya know how many how many he's going to have probably 31 other options.
We also got a look at the "New Gronk," who is now a man of letters. He’s reading books, doing Sudoku on planes to stay sharp, and becoming a student of the game from the broadcast booth. When asked to pick between the two best tight ends currently in the league, Gronk went with the guy who isn't afraid to get his hands dirty.
Rob GronkowskiGeorge Kittle is better than Travis Kelce because he plays in the trenches
[I would take] Kittle. he likes a good 30 in the London in the trenches... he picks up people and he drops them and when he got when he gets that ball he doesn't want to be tackled.
Harden's PR 101 and Jayson Tatum's Beard
The NBA segment took a turn for the literal when James Harden appeared to have a mishap with his shorts. While the internet went wild with poop shaming, PFT Commenter stepped in as a "poop spatter analysis guy" to offer a more hygienic, albeit still gross, explanation.
PFT CommenterJames Harden didn't poop himself; he just didn't wipe properly
I'm like a poop spatter analysis guy and to me that just looked like his prolonged exposure to small amounts of poop that was on his butt. I'm just thinking he didn't wipe well. That's not like I shit myself top-down stain.
Across the league, Jayson Tatum is ascending to superstar status, and Big Cat has discovered the advanced metric that explains why: facial hair connectivity. The numbers don't lie, and once the beard connected, the scoring followed.
Big CatJayson Tatum's scoring increased by 9 PPG since he connected his beard
Since Jayson Tatum fully connected his beard... first 42 games in the season he was averaging 21 points per game... The 11 games after he connected it 30.5 points per game. So he jumped up a full nine points... it is the true definition of look good feel good feel good play good.
We closed things out with a Tim Tebow update. After Tebow tripped over his own feet in the outfield, Big Cat noted that the lack of laughter from his teammates is the most damning part. When people stop making fun of your failures, you've officially moved from "teammate" to "charity case."
Big CatThe reason people don't laugh at Tim Tebow when he fails is because they treat him like a charity case
They want to support [Tebow] because like if you laugh at someone after that, that's just like you're one of the guys. Not being laughed at in that moment is like you're a charity case. You're out here. We're just doing a make a wish for you to play baseball.
Go out and buy a black turtleneck if you want to look like a Silicon Valley swindler or a retired tight end.
