Joey Chestnut is the greatest athlete of all time

Joey Chestnut is the greatest American that has ever lived. One of the greatest athletes of all time. And I think we can confidently say that he is the greatest eater, the greatest human eater of all time... He is the greatest athlete of all time, in my opinion.

The Utah Jazz will be a major problem in 8 to 10 years because of Danny Ainge's draft pick haul

He's [Danny Ainge] just going to get the max amount of pics in the future. And he's just going to do this all again, which he did. I think the Wolves... gave up like six or seven first round picks. So it's essentially like the Jazz are just... going to probably do the same thing with Donovan Mitchell. And it's just going to be the Jazz in like eight to 10 years are going to be a problem. I'm calling it right now.

I want one NBA team to be a centralized location of nonstop drama and 'bad vibes'

I want one team to get all the bad vibes guys. I want the preferably the Lakers. I want them to be like, go on. I want them to keep Russell [Westbrook]... I want like Kyrie [Irving], I want Russell Westbrook on the same team... I want like the biggest shit show of a franchise possible just for the takes.

The Lions will win the NFC North

I think they're gonna be really good. Are the Lions on Crosby watch? ... I think them and maybe the Cowboys might be on Crosby watch. ... I think they probably will win the NFC North.

The Bears could have a top-five offense even if they miss the playoffs

There's a world where the Bears don't make the playoffs, but they're a top-five offense. And our defense is so bad that I can almost—I would be very upset, but I could deal with it.

The Jaguars could win the AFC South

I think the Jaguars are not getting any respect or talked about a lot. I think they're gonna be really good this year. They could win the South. I think Trevor Lawrence is gonna keep going forward.