Joey Chestnut is the greatest athlete of all time

Joey Chestnut is the greatest American that has ever lived. One of the greatest athletes of all time. And I think we can confidently say that he is the greatest eater, the greatest human eater of all time... He is the greatest athlete of all time, in my opinion.

The Nets should refuse to trade Kevin Durant and force him to stay

I actually am of the belief that the Nets should just be like, fuck it. You're staying on the team. You signed a four year deal. Like they used to mean something kind of pushed back player empowerment. Like, Hey, no, you can't be traded. We're going to keep you.

The Utah Jazz will be a major problem in 8 to 10 years because of Danny Ainge's draft pick haul

He's [Danny Ainge] just going to get the max amount of pics in the future. And he's just going to do this all again, which he did. I think the Wolves... gave up like six or seven first round picks. So it's essentially like the Jazz are just... going to probably do the same thing with Donovan Mitchell. And it's just going to be the Jazz in like eight to 10 years are going to be a problem. I'm calling it right now.

The Falcons are a real, flawed good team

I do think that the Falcons are real. Yeah. I think that they're a good team. They're a flawed good team.

The Falcons may have the NFL's best skill-position group

I think that if the Falcons can do that, they have maybe the best set of skill position players in the NFL. If you're able to protect Penix, he's good enough to distribute it and then just let their awesome players do awesome shit.

MLB's proposed check-swing replay would make everything a check swing

Yeah. Parallel with the plate. Yeah. That's what I thought the rule was. And apparently that's just not the rule anymore. If they ever bring this system to Major League Baseball, I get—everything's a check swing.