Skip to content
PMTPMT DB
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Andy Reid should have kept committing penalties at the goal line to prevent the Raiders from ever reaching the end zone

It was the Schrodinger's cat of penalties where the Raiders were mathematically eliminated from scoring touchdowns if you just keep committing penalties and they can only get halfway to the end zone, halfway to the end zone, half the distance, half the distance. They'll never get there. Andy should have just kept his foot on the gas.

This is a satirical take based on a mathematical paradox that doesn't apply to football rules in a literal sense.

More from this episode

View episode
Win
Oct 20, 2017
#6267
Big CatBig Cat

The Dodgers are a better team than the Cubs

I am ready now to admit that the Dodgers are the better team. Was it a gentleman's sweep? Yeah, it was. I love the gentleman's sweep.

The Dodgers defeated the Cubs 4-1 in the 2017 NLCS.
Loss
Oct 20, 2017
#6269
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Yankees are the No. 1 team in the 'Team of Destiny' power rankings

My guess is the Yankees. The Yankees, currently right now, if we're doing our team of destiny power rankings, they're clearly No. 1. The pinstripes are popping extra hot right now.

The Yankees lost the 2017 ALCS to the Astros, so they were ultimately not the team of destiny.
Void
Oct 20, 2017
#6271
Big CatBig Cat

You cannot have a championship drought if you have never won a title

The Astros, the Indians are the longest drought for Major League Baseball. Yes. For a championship. The Rangers are second longest. The Astros are third. The Rangers and the Astros have never won a World Series. Can you have a drought if you've never won a World Series? Because I say no.

This is a subjective definition of the term 'drought' in a sports context.

More from PFT Commenter

View profile
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.