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Loss
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I think fans can convince Coach K to come back for another year

I think that if we all bond together as fans, we can convince Coach K to come back after this year is over.

Coach K did indeed retire after the 2021-2022 season following Duke's loss in the Final Four.

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Win
Nov 10, 2021
#19897
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

We are officially flipping the switch and betting overs in the NBA

The story's gotten too big now. It's gotten too national. So now I'm officially acknowledging we're flipping the switch. We're betting overs in the NBA now. Because too many people are getting – once NPR does a story about a trend in basketball, you can be sure that they're the last ones... So now we're betting overs officially.

While NBA scoring fluctuated, betting overs generally became more viable as the season progressed and offensive efficiencies normalized to the new Wilson ball.
Void
Nov 10, 2021
#19898
Big CatBig Cat

Justin Fields is the real deal

I've never walked out of a game, out of a loss, happier because Justin Fields is the real deal. That's all I took away from that game.

This is subjective but historically interesting; Fields showed flashes but was ultimately traded by the Bears in 2024, showing he wasn't the long-term 'real deal' for them.
Void
Nov 10, 2021
#19899
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Cassius Marsh is the funniest player in the NFL

That guy, he cracks me up. He's the funniest player in the NFL. He's not very good, but he stands out so much. He looks like Cole Beasley if he was a Ninja Turtle.

Subjective opinion on player personality.

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Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.