Mike McCarthy is trying to get fired so Jerry Jones can hire Sean Payton

I think [McCarthy] has been trying to get fired for a while now. And he's doing everything that you would do if you were a coach trying to get fired, knowing that Jerry Jones is just gonna hire Sean Payton probably already has a handshake deal.

The Patriots are no longer a perennial Super Bowl favorite

I'm think I'm just ready to fully admit that the Patriots are not the Patriots anymore. Yeah. They're not the Patriots that I grew up since I was nine years old... If the Patriots make the playoffs, that's a winning season.

I will get shot in the ass with a bow and arrow if the Bears win the Super Bowl

I also will get shot in the ass. If the bears were the Superbowl this year, I'll let Jake shoot me with a bone arrow.

The 2026 World Cup final was boring and sucked.

It was boring ass soccer. It sucked. It made me thankful that the World Cup's over, that football's back. Now we can get back into real football, which I'm very, very thankful for. But that was actually, I think that was the best way to end the World Cup, because I'm totally fine with no more soccer now.

Fanatics Fest is a cynical place designed only to take money from fans.

It also seems like the most cynical place ever. Like, you can go to an autograph festival or a fan festival and you know that the guys are being paid to be there. And they're still like, happy to see, interact with you, all that shit. It just seems like every single thing about being at that place is just designed to take money from the people that are there.

Bryson DeChambeau is being targeted by selective rule enforcement.

I think that Bryson definitely did it and it's definitely against the rules. And he got caught for it and they enforced it against him because he's a bad boy. He's had some run-ins before. I don't think the R&A or whatever, I don't think they're particularly happy with Bryson right now.