NFL Week 1, Fastest 2 Minutes, Recapping Every Game From Sunday, Mahomes Is Still Incredible And The Packers Are Dead

Mike McCarthy is trying to get fired so Jerry Jones can hire Sean Payton

I think [McCarthy] has been trying to get fired for a while now. And he's doing everything that you would do if you were a coach trying to get fired, knowing that Jerry Jones is just gonna hire Sean Payton probably already has a handshake deal.

The Patriots are no longer a perennial Super Bowl favorite

I'm think I'm just ready to fully admit that the Patriots are not the Patriots anymore. Yeah. They're not the Patriots that I grew up since I was nine years old... If the Patriots make the playoffs, that's a winning season.

Jahan Dotson is a good bet for NFL Offensive Rookie of the Year

The past the passes to Johan Dotson were awesome. And Johan Dotson is I'm. I would put a future on him to get rookie of the year.

I will get shot in the ass with a bow and arrow if the Bears win the Super Bowl

I also will get shot in the ass. If the bears were the Superbowl this year, I'll let Jake shoot me with a bone arrow.

The AFC North currently has the greatest division of kickers in NFL history

I think as it stands right now, this for of AFC north kickers could be the greatest division of kickers ever. McPherson was unbelievable. Last year, Tucker with Boswell and K York.

Patrick Mahomes is the best physical quarterback in NFL history

I think we talked to Jules about that. It's like, wait, we haven't really said his name at all and he's probably the best quarterback physically in the history of the NFL.

The Chargers are legitimate Super Bowl contenders

I'm officially now here. Ready to say I'm taking the chargers very much for real, as a team that can win the super bowl. They looked awesome. Their defense looked awesome.

Derek Carr has the worst internal clock and is the most sackable QB in the league

I think he's the most sackable quarterback in the league right now... Derek Carr, the more time he has, the more dangerous it gets for Derek Carr. He's like, oh, I have all this time. I'm gonna do something really fucked up. Really stupid.

The Packers franchise is crumbling

Aaron Rogers hates his wide receivers. He hates them... I'm living in the moment and this moment is very fun. The bears are, want to know the Packers are on one and that franchise is crumbling.

Kirk Cousins has been 'activated' by Kevin O'Connell's new offense

I think cousins has been activated... Kirk cousins this year has the glowing red eyes. He's ready to go. He's ready to take off.

Texas is 'back' following their performance against Alabama

I'm counting Texas's back because their defense played better than they played... And if Quinn Ewers doesn't get hurt, they win that game. I'm convinced of it.

The Sun Belt is the best conference in sports

The Sunbelt is the best conference in America. Yep. Sunbelt east... Best conference in sports.

UNC is the most fun team to watch in college football

I think UNC might be the greatest team to watch in college football. There's so I feel like it's just gonna, you wanna talk about maximum chaos? I feel like that's gonna be UNC every single weekend.