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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Jared Goff is a legitimate MVP candidate because he plays the vast majority of his games in a dome

Jared Goff... he's an MVP candidate because 14 outta 17 games are in a dome. ... It does qualify as a dome. Yep. Okay. Good pick.

Goff had a very strong season, leading the Lions to the #1 seed and finishing near the top of the league in passing yards and touchdowns, though he did not win MVP.

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Win
Sep 6, 2024
#12966
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Xavier Worthy is going to be a problem for everybody

Well, that's the thing is they've got [the Chiefs] got a guy that's gonna be a problem for everybody. I'm gonna, and we said it on draft night, we were like, how did the bills let this happen?

Worthy had a productive rookie season with multiple touchdowns, proving to be a significant deep threat for the Super Bowl-winning Chiefs.
Win
Sep 6, 2024
#26550
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The NFL refs set such a strong tone with illegal formation calls in the opener that they won't need to call it again all weekend

This was a secret point of emphasis to call illegal formation. And now I don't even think that the refs are gonna have to call it for the rest of week one... they set such a tone calling the illegal formation that I don't think they're gonna have to call it down the line.

While the flurry of calls in the Ravens-Chiefs game was an outlier, officials did continue to monitor the alignment throughout the weekend, though not with the same volume of flags.
Push
Sep 6, 2024
#12967
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Justin Tucker might be washed

Justin Tucker might be washed. Yeah. Can't hit 50 yarders anymore.

Tucker had a statistically poor 2024 season by his standards, missing several field goals from 50+ yards, supporting the 'washed' narrative.

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Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.