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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Pete Sampras is the tennis GOAT

I was actually rooting for Djokovic too because the more that you can poke holes in Federer's resume, the more you can say Sampras is the GOAT. ... He is the goat. Sampras is the goat.

While subjective, Sampras's 14 titles have been eclipsed by Djokovic, Nadal, and Federer, making this a minority view today.

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Win
Jul 15, 2019
#2013
Big CatBig Cat

Novak Djokovic is the tennis GOAT

I'm a Djokovic guy. I became a Djokovic guy on Sunday morning. ... Djokovic is the GOAT. He's got 16 Grand Slam titles, and he's six years younger than Federer.

Djokovic currently holds the record for most men's Grand Slam titles (24) and holds a winning head-to-head record against both Federer and Nadal, strengthening the statistical GOAT case.
Void
Jul 15, 2019
#27945
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The person who invented tennis scoring was a crackhead with a brain injury

The person who invented tennis scoring in the first place was just like a crackhead with a brain injury. 15-30-40. And then there's love. Why?

This is a comedic insult and subjective assessment.
Void
Jul 15, 2019
#27939
Big CatBig Cat

I can't stand the US Open's 'Mickey Mouse' uniforms compared to Wimbledon's class

I'm a tradition guy. I don't like the U.S. Open with their mickey mouse uniforms they're all wearing like neon stuff. No thanks. I'm a Wimbledon guy... caught dead in the U.S. Open. The lawn and racket club it's just pure class out there.

This is an aesthetic preference and inherently subjective.

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Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.