The Timberwolves are legit and much better defensively than the Phoenix Suns

The Timberwolves are good and they're deep. Their two stars [Towns and Edwards] did not play great and the Timberwolves still won easily because they're just so much better defensively. And the Suns play iso ball. It's terrible basketball to watch. I think the Timberwolves are really, really good.

Devin Booker is a worse player when he wears a headband

I also have a vibe stat for this game. And it has nothing—it's based on absolutely nothing... I don't think Devin Booker's good when he wears a headband. I just don't know why. I think maybe his head is too constricted. He wears a tight headband.

Therapy would make Luka Doncic a worse basketball player

My take was that Luka, I think Luka desperately needs therapy, but I also think that it would be very, very bad for him as a basketball player. I feel like that shit that he has makes him excellent, but he's just, he's always angry.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.