PMT DBTakes
Big CatLactose intolerance is a fake condition that everyone actually has
Lactose intolerant... that's fake. It's as fake as fake gets. No, it's fake. Everyone's lactose intolerant. If I eat too much ice cream, my tummy hurts. Am I lactose intolerant? So everyone is.
Billy FootballThe Liver King is shorter because he didn't go through the agricultural revolution
He's come for short too... Well, you see, he didn't go through the agricultural revolution. So he was, he's still the size of the early ancestor, tall for his era. You didn't go to the agricultural revolution yet.
Big CatSigning Blake Bortles will change the entire culture of the Seahawks
Following Russell Wilson's injury, the Seahawks are working out the boat. Blake Bortles. Yes, yes, Blake. Oh, my God. I love it... You bring him in to change the whole culture. You bring him in with a contract already signed.
Billy FootballI can turn Ben Mintz into a 'lab rat turned muscle hamster' by controlling his diet and supplements
I now have the perfect opportunity [to] control all the variables and turn Ben Mintz into a lab rat turned muscle hamster... Basically I control all the variables. Like literally he's not going to be able to eat a meal without me. I'm going to pump this guy full of creatine, get him squatting heavy and see what happens.
PFT CommenterMike Francesa invented the concept of a podcast co-host
He invented co-hosts. Mike Francesa, in addition to Daily Fantasy, has invented co-hosts. My idea.
PFT CommenterMen evolved to nut fast to avoid being killed by woolly mammoths
From a Darwinian perspective, it's actually an advantage. Guys evolved to nut fast. Right. So we can spread our seed and be more efficient so that we don't get killed when we're like having a romantic tryst by a wandering woolly mammoth or T-Rex.
PFT CommenterNick Saban is an underachiever because he only wins a title every other year
Nick Saban's an underachiever... with this in mind, five national titles really does not seem like enough in an 11-year period. If Saban were as good at being a head coach as he is at recruiting, Alabama would have won the national title on a yearly basis. But he isn't.