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Win
Jun 2, 2017·Lronmexico Rap
#29804
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

Is That Mario Andretti? No, That's Jim Irsay

Is that Mario Andretti? Nah, that's Jim Irsay.

OpinionFootballScorchingSarcastic
Jim Irsay was arrested for OWI in March 2014 in a suburb of Indianapolis. He was going notably slower than Andretti's typical pace.
Void
Jun 2, 2017·Lronmexico Rap
#29811
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

Piss In Your Pants Just To Make A Statement

Piss in your pants just to make a statement.

Hot TakeLifeScorchingSubjective
There is no medical or social context in which urinating in your own pants constitutes a statement. Unless you're defining grit, in which case it's the only statement.
Void
Jul 15, 2016·Lronmexico Rap
#29797
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

I Hope Marlins Man's Horses Die In A Lake

Fuck your law firm, I hope they lie to your face. Fuck your horses, I hope they die in a lake.

OpinionLifeScorchingSubjective
This is a wish, not a claim. As of this writing, Marlins Man's horses have not died in a lake.
Void
Jul 15, 2016·Lronmexico Rap
#29798
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

I Hope Marlins Man Gets Found Like Catherine The Great

I hope you get found like Catherine the Great.

OpinionLifeScorchingSubjective
References the apocryphal myth that Catherine the Great died during an encounter with a horse. Historians widely regard this as slander spread by her political enemies. Still devastating as a diss.
Void
Jul 15, 2016·Lronmexico Rap
#29799
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

Ask Brady, Marino, Wade, And LeBron About Me And Your Mom

So call Brady, Marino, Wade and LeBron. And ask 'em 'bout me and your mom.

Hot TakeLifeScorchingSubjectiveSarcastic
Weaponizing Marlins Man's celebrity friendships against him while adding a mom joke. Whether Brady, Marino, Wade, and LeBron know Hample's mom remains unverified.
Win
May 4, 2016·Lronmexico Rap
#29785
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

RG3 Went From Deadspin Redskin To Downtown Browns Clown

You was a Deadspin Redskin full of the drama. Now you a downtown Browns clown in love with Osama.

Hot TakeFootballScorching
RG3's career arc from Washington media circus to Cleveland punchline is accurately summarized here. The Deadspin reference captures the constant negative coverage.
Win
May 4, 2016·Lronmexico Rap
#29786
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

RG3 Did Subway Commercials — You Know Who Else Did?

RG Knee, so controversial. You know who else did Subway commercials?

OpinionFootballScorchingSarcastic
RG3 did appear in Subway ads. Jared Fogle was sentenced to 15+ years in prison in 2015. The implication is devastating.
Void
Oct 22, 2015·Lronmexico Rap
#29776
L. Ron MexicoL. Ron Mexico

Being Christian And Being Elite Are One And The Same

Christian and elite, those are one and the same.

Hot TakeFootballScorchingSubjective
A bold theological-athletic hypothesis. Sample size of one (Danny Woodhead) is technically unimpeachable.

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