Takes

The twist of Walton Goggins killing his father in the White Lotus finale was 'cheap'

Walton Goggins in like the last 10 minutes kills the guy. And then the other woman's like, 'why would you do that? He's your father.' It's like, come on... That felt a little ham-fisted. It was just a little cheap.

Ovechkin breaking the goal record from his office against the Islanders was the perfect way to end the chase

It was awesome to see him score from his office against the Islanders... Ovie was like, 'fuck it, I know it's at home [and I don't want an empty netter]'. He did it perfectly. That shot has been happening for 20 years. Nobody's ever figured out how to stop it. He did it from his office.

Blackhawks owner Jerry Reinsdorf is a piece of shit

I've been watching all the games illegally this year. Good for you. I have a workaround that I'm, I will not tell, but I have a workaround that I've been watching the games illegally because [Jerry Reinsdorf] is such a piece of shit. Yeah. I don't wanna give him money. He sucks.

Alex Ovechkin's mom is terrifying and could definitely beat me up

His mom, I'm terrified of Ovie's mom by the way. I think she could beat the fuck outta me. Probably, yeah.

Walter Clayton Jr. is so raw that you forget his first name is Walter

Walter Clayton Jr. is so raw, you forget his first name is Walter. [T Black] replied with a bunch of laughing emojis, but that's the facts. He was making shots that you can't really [stop]... he's just doing shit that is on a different level.

Elijah Martin is currently the best dunker in college basketball

Elijah Martin, he might be the best dunker in college basketball right now. That's how I evaluate NBA talent based on how you dunk in college. Elijah Martin, take him one.

Duke's failure to make the championship game is due to their lack of a true point guard

Turns out you need a point guard. An actual point guard. As soon as Houston started putting the pressure on inbounding the ball, [you need] a point guard who can bring the ball up the court... Proctor, a true point guard, being like, 'I got this' as the worst free throw shooter on the court for Duke was absolutely insane. Cost them the game.

Coach K is secretly happy that Duke lost because it protects his legacy

If we had true serum Coach K's happy. He doesn't want the next guy to win a title in his third year... John Scheyer, the, the, the school has not dropped off in terms of a level of basketball. But what Coach K has done to win titles gets magnified even more of. That's really hard to do because John Scheyer couldn't do it with one of the best analytically best teams of all time.

I am an asshole at times, but I won't change my coaching style because it produces historic success

I'm an asshole at times. I mean that's, you know, it's just who I am... I don't wanna change a whole lot of things about the way that I go about my coaching and my fire and my intensity because it has produced historic success at UConn the last couple of years.

Houston is a team of wolves led by a wolf

Houston is just a bunch of wolves, man led by a wolf... the way they get after it, you, you can't prepare for it. It's like a pass rush that just the quarterback is gonna be rattled and it kills, it kills your transition offensive game because it's hard for you to even run on them because getting a defensive rebound feels like survival.

People will discover in my book that I am smarter and darker than they think I am

I think that people are going to discover that I'm smarter than people think that I am. And that also I'm a lot darker than people think that I am. I'm very honest in the book about my struggles and about my shortcomings and the difficulties that I've had... This dude really is goth in his soul.

Mike Florio's idea of the Bengals and Bears sharing a stadium in Chicago is absurd

The Bengals... Could be to partner up in a new Chicagoland stadium. I disagree. That is not the best outcome for the Bengals. No, not at all. Not even close... I feel like Florio didn't, Florio's the problem always. He's, you, you point at he's the reason that, that you would accept a, a new team that you don't care about.

Cliff Kingsbury buying a one-way ticket to Thailand is the horniest move an adult male can make

I just keep thinking to myself like, this is the place that Cliff Kingsbury bought a one-way ticket to. I think that's the horniest move that an adult male can do. Is to buy a one-way ticket to Thailand.

The Celtics are healthy and can beat anyone in the NBA

I just, they're saying the Celtics are healthy, they can beat anyone. [The Thunder] are really, really good team and they could do everything, but they don't have the experience. And I think even if both teams are fully healthy and playing their A games, the Celtics still win.

Any NBA team that plays well in March is a 'fake' team because the month doesn't matter

March NBA does not fucking matter because half the teams are not even trying. So when you say, oh man, look at this team so hot in March. Turns out that's all Fools Gold. If you start playing well in March, you're just a fake team. That's really what it comes down to.

Shohei Ohtani has reached maximum aura and is the definitive face of baseball

Does Shohei Ohtani have Aura? Because I think he has maximum Aura. First pitch home run. Just, he doesn't change anything about his expression, swing anything. It's just business as usual. I think Shohei Ohtani has reached the next level of Superstardom where he just has the most aura in the game. It's settled. Shohei is the face.

I am officially done with all NBA era comparison debates

I'm officially done with conversations comparing eras in the NBA. I feel like that's all that is talked about at this point. I'm getting tired of it. Why can't we just say all the good players would be good in their era? Good basketball players are good. Case closed.

The WWE Championship is essentially a de-facto office position with leadership responsibilities

What I really quickly found out is that it is almost a de-facto position in the office. It's a bigger position than just man and tights wrestling. There's a layer of responsibility, like a team captain. And especially for being a good guy character, to have the title this long is rather unheard of because everyone just tries to murder you every week.

Big men everywhere start dreading April because they lose the ability to hide under sweatshirts

We're getting to t-shirt weather. Do we have a plan? The first nice day where it's 70 degrees and you hold onto the sweatshirt and you're like, 'this is uncomfortable.' And you realize I'm gonna have to start wearing a t-shirt. It's the worst feeling in the world. I forgot that I couldn't just wear a sweatshirt for the entire year.

Under the NFL's new overtime rules, you should choose to kick if you win the coin toss.

Now we're gonna have to recalibrate because you win the coin toss. You don't want the ball first. Correct? 'cause then you want to know if you need to go for two on a touchdown.

The NFL's use of the 'player safety' label is almost always a facade for other league interests.

I'm tired of them pretending it's player safety and then being like, let's add another game or add more overtime. It's not player safety. It's never, whenever they say player safety, it's never player safety.

April Fools' Day is the lowest form of comedy.

I'm done with this show. I'm done with this episode. I'm opting out for the rest of this episode. Because April Fools is the lowest form of comedy.

Buzz Williams moving to Maryland is a smart move to reset his coaching clock.

So this move, I believe was a smart move by Buzz in the fact that the SEC has gotten a lot better. He has kind of maxed out what he's got at Texas A&M... So why not move and reset the clock?

Being the partner of a massive celebrity like Sydney Sweeney is a 'down bad' situation in the short term but ultimately better for your long-term sanity.

So down bad right now. But yeah, I think long term would have, you'd have to be a very confident man to be able to deal with your fiance or wife having the entire internet be horny for her at all times. So... I think long term he's probably gonna be like, you know what? That was, that was gonna be tough.

Auburn felt like a special team early in the season after competing physically with Houston.

We had to play an an incredibly well coached, hard playing Houston team where we were gonna find out whether we were gonna be physical and tough enough... once we were able to beat Houston or at least be on compete with 'em, we felt like this team had a chance to be pretty special.

The 2025 Final Four features the four most deserving and dominant teams in the country.

I don't think you can name a fifth team that this year deserves to be playing for the national championship more than the four teams that are, are alive. And there's something really, really good about that.

To beat top golfers like Scottie Scheffler, you cannot take shortcuts; you have to work as hard or harder than them or you'll fall behind.

Right now I can say that I work hard and I don't feel like I leave too much out there... You're gonna fall behind if you don't [practice hard]. If you wanna beat Scotty [Scheffler], you gotta work hard. You gotta play good and practice hard to beat all these top players.

College basketball is a Ponzi scheme

I was gonna say it's college basketball. A Ponzi scheme. Mm. Because the tournament starts. Just wait. Did not Great Matchups round of 32. Gonna be great. Round of 32's not great, just wait. Good. So sweet 16. Sweet 16 happens. Oh, that sucked. But just wait. This is the best Elite eight you've ever seen. The Elite eight sucks. But just wait. The final four, we're kicking the can down the road.

Houston is the biggest 'Cinderella' of the Final Four

I have Houston one, then I had Florida two... [Houston] because they've never won a national title. They don't have any legacy in basketball outside of Charles Barkley. And obviously what Bruce Pearl's done, I think they would be the second Cinderella. Florida still has, you know, they, they back to back national titles.

I hate that I don't hate this current Duke team

I'm basically landed on the fact that I think my hate for Duke is now just the fact that I don't hate this Duke team. Like, do something to make me hate you. Get to a fight. I hate that I don't hate them. You know what the issue is? That's what's making me mad.

NIL has ruined college basketball

I just NIL ruined college basketball. I don't wanna be a hater, but it it... I just want madness. I don't care if, if the games are good, I wouldn't care. But yeah, the, I want good games.

College basketball should implement a salary ladder to discourage transfers

A freshman gets 50 K from the school. A sophomore gets 75, a junior gets a hundred. If you transfer, you go back to freshman salary. So like, there is a, you could still transfer, you can still do whatever you want, but you don't get to climb the ladder of, of what the school can pay you.

The Chicago Bulls will use the Play-In tournament to justify mediocrity

When they originally announced the play in, I was like this is going to be for franchises like the Bulls, Jerry Reinsdorf is gonna use this as like 'we almost made the playoffs' every single year and they're exactly in that spot. Again. They shouldn't be a playoff team.

Increased runs and homers are objectively good for baseball

Why you watch baseball? To watch homers? Yeah. Why do people want less homers? Yeah. Like everything in baseball right now is going towards the pitcher. The one time, the one time something goes towards the hitter and now everyone wants to freak out. That's what baseball's fun. You wanna watch people hit, you wanna, this is good for baseball. More runs is good for baseball

Kevin Willard intentionally criticized Maryland to force his way out to Villanova

Willard was ripping on things to see them get fixed. I tend to look at it as, and I'm not saying I don't think this should have been handled differently, I tend to think of it as he was being critical of all these things to clear a runway for getting out.

Derrick Queen is the primary reason Maryland reached the Sweet 16

Who's the reason why Maryland was in their first Sweet 16 since 2016? [Derrick] Queen. And who recruited him? Probably not Kevin Willard himself. But [Queen] made an epic shot.

Texas Tech deserves all the credit for their win over Arkansas

Texas Tech, incredible fight by them. They deserve all the credit. They willed it... Texas Tech, we deserve that game.

No team in the country beats Alabama when they shoot like they did against BYU

I don't think any team in the country beats Alabama if they're shooting like that. It was absolutely nuts.

I am worried about Kevin Willard's future tenure at Villanova

I'm worried about [Kevin Willard's] tenure at Villanova. That's a past, we're worried about the future. And Kevin Willard to Villanova... that's what I care about.

I'm officially a 'Crown' (NIT) guy and will be watching it all week

I'm actually jacked up for the Crown... I'm a Crown guy. I'm excited for the Crown.

Skip Bayless is the biggest loser of the LeBron interview on Pat McAfee

All this to say Skip Bayless was not mentioned once and all Skip Bayless wants to do is get mentioned by LeBron. He's the big loser in all of this.

LeBron's swearing in the McAfee interview made him more relatable

The part that I liked the most was the swearing. It makes him relatable. It was the best swear.

The MLB postseason is more of a crapshoot than fans realize

The great equalizer in baseball is that its postseason is just kind of a crapshoot. Like even the best team is gonna go into a series with a 60% chance of winning. Not a whole lot higher than that.

The Pirates have an incredible pitching staff but failed to support them this offseason

The Pirates have an incredible pitching staff and they didn't do shit this off season... go out and try to field a winning team.

Mike Trout may never know what winning feels like in his professional career

It saddens me that Mike Trout might never know what winning feels like... Mike Trout simply has never had that in his professional career.

Shohei Ohtani's two-way dominance is more impressive than Travis Hunter's

Shohei Ohtani [is more impressive] because he has done it at the big league level... Ohtani being elite at both levels at the highest level of baseball. If Travis Hunter can be an all pro cornerback and an all pro wide receiver in the same season, get back to me.

The character we saw at the end of the Severance finale was actually Outie Helly

I feel like the real theory is that it's Outie Helly at the end of the episode. Because she brings him in back and smiled at Gemma. And Irv said Innie Helly was never cruel. And it was kind of a cruel looking smile when she looked at Gemma and was like, 'I won.'

Dan Hurley being an asshole is good for college basketball

If your job is to talk about sports, I want more Dan Hurleys. I don't want people giving cliche answers. I want guys who have some type of personality that is not just, you know, 'we're gonna do our best out there.' Saying he's bad for the sport is just stupid to me.

Sportsmanship should stop at the Little League level

The sportsmanship stops at Little League. That's really what it is. Like when people are like, oh, you gotta win class. You gotta do the—that shit is not for high level college basketball, high level pro sports. I don't care. I want bad losers. I want people who are, who crash out when they lose.

The Giants' QB room of Russ, Jameis, and DeVito is a 'pre-fire head coach' move

If you look at these quarterbacks that they have, the three QBs they've got in that room, that is a pre-fire head coach. A hundred percent. If those three guys are your plan... Brian Daboll, you're gonna be a great offensive coordinator somewhere.