Duke will win the 2025 National Championship

I have been saying for a month and a half now that it is Duke's year. And I do fully think that they are, they feel like even though it is a loaded Final Four, they feel a little step ahead. I will not be rooting for Duke, but I am also resigned to the fact they will probably win.

Cliff Kingsbury buying a one-way ticket to Thailand is the horniest move an adult male can make

I just keep thinking to myself like, this is the place that Cliff Kingsbury bought a one-way ticket to. I think that's the horniest move that an adult male can do. Is to buy a one-way ticket to Thailand.

Any NBA team that plays well in March is a 'fake' team because the month doesn't matter

March NBA does not fucking matter because half the teams are not even trying. So when you say, oh man, look at this team so hot in March. Turns out that's all Fools Gold. If you start playing well in March, you're just a fake team. That's really what it comes down to.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?