Takes

Jimmy Garoppolo's move to the Raiders was a 'dog move' just to fuck around in Vegas with zero expectations

My respect for Jimmy G went up thinking about the fact that he took the contract to go play in Las Vegas. 67.5 million dollars to go hang out in Las Vegas and just fuck around for a few years with probably zero expectation of winning. That's a dog move. He did not do that to win football games. He did that to fuck around and have a good time.

The Phillies losing Game 2 was a 'better way to lose' than a bad loss because they showed fight

I would much rather see go down like that than if they were to roll over. It's not a good loss. It was a bad loss... but the team showed enough fight to win that game. The Braves just played better in the ninth. I would rather see [that].

Miami's failure to take a knee against Georgia Tech might be the worst regular season loss ever

I think that Miami loss might've been the worst loss ever. Not taking a knee 35 seconds left in the game... The game is won. Game is over. I watched that clip so many times and I still couldn't comprehend what was going on.

This season might be Nick Saban's best coaching job ever

I'm actually gonna go, I'm gonna reverse everything we said a couple weeks ago after the USF game... Is this Nick Saban's best coaching job? He doesn't really have a quarterback... Jalen Milroe throws a great, great ball [but] neither quarterback can throw the intermediate stuff. But Alabama has found something like we are a defensive team... it could be Nick Saban's best coaching job.

NIL is actually good for college football because players stay longer and market themselves

Maybe the NIL isn't the death of college football. America's getting smarter and we're watching more football... players get to stay longer because now they can make money. Players get to market themselves... the fact that players can actually, we can put a face to their name now and they're out in front of it, it might be good for the sport. Who would've thought?

The Official World Golf Ranking's decision to ignore LIV Golf is absolute bullshit

The official golf world ranking has chosen to just ignore LIV golf as a real sport or league. Shit. So LIV golf players are not gonna be able to qualify for majors and things like that... it's a problem for them when you have LIV golf players that are winning majors to then say that the tour that they play on doesn't produce players that are good enough.

LeBron James being left off the NBA executive poll for clutch shooters is a personal insult

Which player would you want taking a shot with the game on the line? Number one was Steph Curry... LeBron James wasn't there. LeBron getting left off that list, that seems personal. He's gonna have to use that. He's gonna go to Zero Dark 30.

Jerry Jones wants the Cowboys to run the Iowa offense with an all-tight end focus

Jerry Jones went on radio and said something ridiculous... They asked him about getting CeeDee Lamb more involved and Jerry Jones said, 'I don't know about that. I like seeing the ball go to tight ends.' Oh, your star wide receiver? That is a mismatch. Nope. Let's go tight ends. Jerry Jones, he wants to run the Iowa offense.

Jared Goff is a 'poor man's Matt Ryan'

He reminds me a lot of your former QB [Matt Ryan], maybe a poor man's Matt Ryan. It's not a slight on him. Matt's a great quarterback... Jared's great at the play action. He's great when you give him time. Get after him a little bit, speed up his clock. He's playing great right now. He's a guy that's resilient.

The top four quarterbacks in the NFL right now are Patrick Mahomes, Josh Allen, Tua Tagovailoa, and Brock Purdy

Patrick Mahomes. Josh Allen. I've got two more I'm gonna go with—people are gonna be furious—Tua and Brock Purdy. [Leaving off Jalen Hurts] Brock knows his weaknesses, he knows his strengths... he's on a different level than most other quarterbacks in the league.

Brock Purdy's processing ability is on a different level than most NFL quarterbacks

The processing ability of [Brock Purdy] read one, read two, read three, every time he makes a decision to scramble outside the pocket, like the guy is almost perfect in the way that he thinks about the game and his mind just computes what's happening. So it's an amazing thing. This guy, he's throwing the ball down the field. It's not Checkdown Fest... Him up here [in the head], he's on a different level than most other quarterbacks in the league.

Russell Wilson is playing himself out of Hall of Fame consideration with his performance in Denver

If that was a Hall of Fame career, those first 10 years and winning the Super Bowl and all those wins, it does feel like he's playing himself outta consideration the last few years. You look at his relationship with Sean Payton and how already you're getting the eye rolls.

The only way to stop the Eagles' 'tush push' is to legally or illegally blow up the center and quarterback to make them uncomfortable

How do you stop the tush push? Why are you not taking your biggest defender and having them try to time out the snap count and just blow up the center and the quarterback? Worst case scenario, that's a five yard penalty... next time they're like, 'oh my God, this is gonna happen again.' Jason Kelce's gonna be like, 'look, we gotta stop calling this play.' Make Jason Kelce uncomfortable.

You cannot tank in the NFL because everyone is playing for their next contract

It's a great point that we forget... The tank—you can't tank in the NFL, it's impossible to tank. Because everyone's trying, playing for a job. So even when a team looks terrible, they're still gonna go out... you can't tank on a full season.

You cannot tell the story of football without Ryan Fitzpatrick

So we thank you. Wow. So you, we just made your case for the Hall of Fame. You cannot tell the story of football without Ryan Fitzpatrick.

Aaron Nola's upcoming Game 3 start defines everything for his Phillies legacy

This is the everything Aaron Nola game. This defines everything because I'm kind of an Aaron Nola hater, but if he pitches well, I'll love him forever. If he pitches poorly, I never wanna see his face again... Mentally he will be dead in my brain.

The 49ers would win the Super Bowl if it were played today

The 49ers. Congratulations. The 49ers. They won the Week five Super Bowl. If the Super Bowl were played today, I say that the 49ers would win easily.

Brock Purdy is 100% a top 10 quarterback

Brock Purdy is 100% a top 10 quarterback. If you disagree, you aren't watching the games. Brock Purdy is just good. He's just very good.

The Eagles, 49ers, and Lions are the only three really good teams in the NFC

I feel like today was a day that we found out there are three really, really good teams in the NFC and then there's everyone else. I'm referring to the Philadelphia Eagles, the San Francisco 49ers and the Detroit Lions.

The Bills threw away the Jaguars game because of their terrible travel schedule to London.

The Bill's schedule to go to London... made no sense. ... They actually looked like they were sleepwalking in the first half. ... The Bills basically threw this game away with how they travel.

Jalen Warren should be getting Najee Harris's touches for the Steelers

Jalen Warren should get Najee Harris' touches. He's so good. So much better than Najee Harris. Anybody with eyes can see Jalen Warren carry the ball and be like, this guy has 10 times the burst Najee has.

Gardner Minshew is the best backup quarterback in the NFL.

Gardner Minshew is the best backup in the league. ... He has now had to come in what, three times this year. And the Colts are three and two.

The Lions have one of the best rosters in the NFL and are almost a 'great' team.

If you look objectively at their roster right now, they're one of the best rosters in the NFL. ... Lions are almost a great team.

The Patriots should rebuild around the lighthouse and fire Bill Belichick and Mac Jones

The lighthouse is all we got. That's really the only, like, I think you rebuild around the lighthouse. Get rid of Belichick, get rid of Mac Jones and just build around the lighthouse. Build an entire team around the lighthouse.

CJ Stroud needs to throw a reckless triple-coverage interception to be a true gunslinger

I'd like him to just throw a ball that, you know, there's no chance it's gonna be completed... he needs to throw a reckless interception. Like triple coverage. Just trying to do it all in arm strength.

It is 'loser shit' to ban the Brotherly Shove just because defenses can't stop it

The NFL actually might stop it... which is it's, that's loser shit right there. Listen, I'm saying this as a Commanders fan, as a division rival, it's loser shit to ban the brotherly shove because just 'cause you can't stop it doesn't mean that they shouldn't be able to do it.

Miami's loss to Georgia Tech is the literal worst loss of all time.

Miami maybe the worst loss of all time. The literal worst loss of all time. Mario Cristobal with 35 seconds left, ran the ball instead of kneeing the ball. ... Incomprehensible.

Ron Rivera should never be called 'Riverboat Ron' again

Ron Rivera just kicked another field goal. The Bears have won. He loves field goals. That guy loves field goals, so we should never ever call him riverboat Ron again after this game and the game against the Eagles, he's, he's lost riverboat Ron. He's no longer riverboat. Ron.

Justin Fields is a good quarterback and I was right for not wavering on him

I'm oh, I'm thinking Justin Fields is a good quarterback. I was right about that. Credit to me for not wavering on that take.

The Phillies home environment is unlike anything else in professional sports

I stand by it. I mean, I'm not the only one who's been saying... like, that video of the crowd singing Bryson Stott's walk-up song as he walks to the plate and then five seconds later hitting a grand slam is like one of the coolest sports videos of the year.

Brock Purdy is an MVP candidate

Should we be talking about Brock Purdy MVP Watch? If you look at his stats right now, Brock Purdy has MVP level stats right now. That's all I'm saying. He's the number one quarterback in the entire NFL in yards per attempt.

Russell Wilson has only looked better because he's played terrible defenses

Is there a chance that Russell Wilson, he's looked better, but he has not played a good defense? ...he played the Raiders, bad defense. Commanders, bad defense. He played the Dolphins, bad defense. And then last week they played the Bears, the worst defense. So is there a chance that we see bad Russ here against the Jets defense?

Daniel Jones is not a franchise quarterback for the Giants

Eli [Manning] had a fucking arm. What are you talking about comparing Daniel Jones? Jones actually plays like the way racists talk about black quarterbacks. All he can do is run... I have a hard time watching Daniel Jones. He was at the Comedy Cellar one night and I was like, I don't even care. That's a bad level that he's my starting quarterback.

Making the playoffs and losing every game is the worst fate for a sports fan

I actually think that making the playoffs and losing every single game is the worst fate of any fan base. Like I would rather be the worst team and just be like, I can just erase it from my memory. Draft Picks, whatever you wanna sell yourself on getting, being good enough to get to the playoffs and then not winning a game For more than almost two decades. That is the worst.

Playoff baseball at Citizens Bank Park is one of the hardest environments in all of professional sports

Playoff Baseball at the bank is one of the hardest environments in professional sports. It's different. It's different than any other stadium. I mean, you just see it, the feels different. It sounds different.

Booing doesn't work for baseball players because it's a game of confidence, but it works for football players

Baseball's a different sport. It's about confidence. Booing doesn't do anything for a Baseball player, for a football player. Getting booed gets a little driving, you get a little angry. You, you maybe get a little push on the guy next to you and Baseball. It's a mental game, it's a game of confidence.

Daniel Jones is officially 'Ass'

The official prognosis coming out of [Monday Night Football] is I think medically speaking, Daniel Jones's Ass.

The Texas Longhorns should be the number one team in the country

I actually think it should be the Texas Longhorns [at number one].

I want to see Michigan vs. Texas in the National Championship game

I want to see Michigan and Texas in the national championship. It would rule, I think that would be awesome to have a, a title game that doesn't have Alabama, Georgia, or Ohio State in it.

Lincoln Riley is committing coaching malpractice by never giving Caleb Williams a defense

I think the discussion is, is Lincoln Riley liable for malpractice for having one of the best college quarterbacks maybe of all time if he goes back to back Heisman and Caleb Williams and never having a defense behind him because that defense is so bad.

Trent Williams should be spoken of in the same manner as Aaron Donald

Trent Williams... is a cheat code for the Niners. Yeah, he should be spoken of in the same manner as Aaron Donald.

Taylor Swift probably thinks Zach Wilson is the greatest quarterback of all time

If Taylor Swift, this is her second football game she's ever been to know of, she probably thinks that Zach Wilson is the greatest quarterback of all time. 'Cause he is outplaying Patrick Mahomes.

Taylor Swift is a distraction for the Kansas City Chiefs

I think we need to have the conversation. Is Taylor Swift a distraction? I just love the word distraction because you can just throw it out there for anything. But I do think that if there was going to be a distraction, probably be like the most famous person in the world dating your tight end.

Desmond Ridder sucks

Desmond Ridder sucks. It's, it's the truth. Like the Falcons are built a certain way that you can't have a quarterback throw interceptions, and it is painful to watch their offense sometimes.

The Buffalo Bills' championship window is wide open

I think the Window's wide open. They've got, they've got like years of the window. They're, they're gonna be fine. Josh [Allen] will be fine. He stinks against the Jets. It was a shitty game. He played awful that game... the Bills are gonna get better.

Joe Burrow is too injured to be playing right now and the Bengals should sit him

He's [Burrow] injured. He's very injured. He has sucked this year... He is a tough ass dude that has a lot of pride. But at some point, like maybe try to get healthy and, and sneak into a wild card spot because right now it doesn't look good... I would take the keys out of his hand.

Matt Eberflus is a bonehead and a bad coach

Matt Eberflus is the reason why the Bears lost. Matt Eberflus is a fucking bonehead idiot and a bad coach... He's not a head coach. He is an absolute cluster fuck... He has no idea how to answer questions. He has no idea how to deal with the locker room.

The Bears should just tank and lose every single game for the rest of the season

Just Tank. Just lose every game. I, at this point just lose every game because you gotta change everything. ... I'll take a new band-aid 'cause it'll make me feel better for a little bit.

Mac Jones is bad and it is time for the Patriots to move on

Mac Jones is bad. Mac Jones is not the guy... They looked hopeless... I think it's time to move on. It's time... You can't get worse than the worst loss in Belichick's career. I'd rather do that with Zappe. Mac Jones, it's time to go.

Christian McCaffrey should be the NFL MVP

I think Christian McCaffrey should be the MVP... Could we have a running back that's the MVP of the league? Yeah. He's on pace for nearly 2000 yards... If the Saturday before the Super Bowl was today, Christian McCaffrey would win MVP.