PMT DB
PMT DB
Week 5 Recap: Cowboys Get Whomped, Lions Are For Real, and the Patriots Hit Rock Bottom
Week 5 is in the books, and it felt like the Sunday where the pretenders finally got exposed. Taping in the middle of Surviving Barstool meant things were a bit chaotic in the New York office, but nothing was more chaotic than watching Dak Prescott and the Cowboys get absolutely dismantled by the 49ers in prime time. It was a measuring stick game, and as PFT Commenter pointed out, the stick was mostly being used to kick the Cowboys' asses.
The NFC Hierarchy is Set
While the Cowboys were getting exposed, the 49ers solidified themselves as the clear class of the league. George Kittle had three touchdowns, and the Brock Purdy discourse has reached a point where his play is simply undeniable. Big Cat made it clear that if you aren't on the Purdy train by now, you're just not watching the football games.
Big CatBrock Purdy is 100% a top 10 quarterback
Brock Purdy is 100% a top 10 quarterback. If you disagree, you aren't watching the games. Brock Purdy is just good. He's just very good.
Purdy looks like a franchise guy, and his efficiency has the Niners looking like the early favorites to take it all. PFT isn't just calling them contenders; he thinks they're the best team in the world right now.
PFT CommenterThe 49ers would win the Super Bowl if it were played today
The 49ers. Congratulations. The 49ers. They won the Week five Super Bowl. If the Super Bowl were played today, I say that the 49ers would win easily.
Beyond San Francisco, the hierarchy in the NFC is becoming very exclusive. The guys agreed that there is a massive gap between the elite tier and the rest of the conference.
PFT CommenterThe Eagles, 49ers, and Lions are the only three really good teams in the NFC
I feel like today was a day that we found out there are three really, really good teams in the NFC and then there's everyone else. I'm referring to the Philadelphia Eagles, the San Francisco 49ers and the Detroit Lions.
London Calling and Grounding the Bills
The Jaguars continued their residency in London by knocking off the Bills, who looked like they were running on three hours of sleep and a dream. Buffalo's decision to fly out so late in the week backfired spectacularly as they sleepwalked through the first half. Big Cat was baffled by the travel logistics, noting that the Bills basically gave the game away before it even started.
Big CatThe Bills threw away the Jaguars game because of their terrible travel schedule to London.
The Bill's schedule to go to London... made no sense. ... They actually looked like they were sleepwalking in the first half. ... The Bills basically threw this game away with how they travel.
PFT, ever the innovator, suggested a more medical approach to international travel for future teams looking to avoid the "sleepyhead" Josh Allen performance.
PFT CommenterNFL teams should fly to London earlier and use medically induced comas to acclimate
What should happen is the moment you get a chance, like maybe that Monday... you put your guys in medically induced coma, knocked them out, put them onto London time, get their body naturally acclimated, fly them over while they're all knocked out. And then you get there, you practice through the week. You use a copious amount of drugs to put them asleep at night and wake them up in the morning.
AFC North Grittiness and the Best Backup
Steelers-Ravens was exactly what we expected: ugly, violent, and full of drops. The Ravens wide receivers seemed to have hands made of stone, dropping multiple touchdowns that would have put the game away. Meanwhile, Jalen Warren continues to look like the most explosive player in the Steelers' backfield, leading to PFT calling for a change in the depth chart.
PFT CommenterJalen Warren should be getting Najee Harris's touches for the Steelers
Jalen Warren should get Najee Harris' touches. He's so good. So much better than Najee Harris. Anybody with eyes can see Jalen Warren carry the ball and be like, this guy has 10 times the burst Najee has.
Over in Indy, Gardner Minshew continues to be the ultimate safety net. With Anthony Richardson going down again, Minshew stepped in and navigated a seven-minute fourth-quarter drive to bury the Titans. Big Cat is officially calling him the premier insurance policy in the NFL.
Big CatGardner Minshew is the best backup quarterback in the NFL.
Gardner Minshew is the best backup in the league. ... He has now had to come in what, three times this year. And the Colts are three and two.
Rock Bottom in Foxborough
Hank is officially in the darkness. The Patriots were shut out 34-0 at home by the Saints, marking the worst two-week stretch in Bill Belichick's legendary career. Mac Jones has more pick-sixes at Gillette Stadium than Tom Brady, and the offense hasn't scored in ten quarters. Hank is ready to burn it all down and start over with a very specific centerpiece.
HankThe Patriots should rebuild around the lighthouse and fire Bill Belichick and Mac Jones
The lighthouse is all we got. That's really the only, like, I think you rebuild around the lighthouse. Get rid of Belichick, get rid of Mac Jones and just build around the lighthouse. Build an entire team around the lighthouse.
As the Patriots' season spirals, PFT floated a conspiracy theory that Belichick might be sabotaging the roster on his way out the door, possibly looking toward a homecoming in Nashville with the Titans.
PFT CommenterBill Belichick is ruining the Patriots on purpose to make them easier to beat when he joins a new team
I think he's ruining the Patriots because he's gonna go somewhere else and then he'll make the Patriots easier to beat when he's at the next location. Vrabel to the Patriots Belichick to the Titans... Vanderbilt is where my dad coached Nashville is where I was born... It's coming home.
Quick Hits and Overly Direct Takes
The Lions are no longer a feel-good story; they are a legitimate powerhouse. Even without Amon-Ra St. Brown and Jahmyr Gibbs, they hung 42 on the Panthers. PFT is convinced this roster is one of the most complete in football.
PFT CommenterThe Lions have one of the best rosters in the NFL and are almost a 'great' team.
If you look objectively at their roster right now, they're one of the best rosters in the NFL. ... Lions are almost a great team.
In Denver, the Nathaniel Hackett revenge game was a success, as the Jets took down Sean Payton’s Broncos. Big Cat couldn't help but point out that Hackett actually managed to make Zach Wilson look more competent than Payton has made Russell Wilson look all year.
Big CatNathaniel Hackett did a better job coaching Zach Wilson than Sean Peyton did coaching Russell Wilson.
Nathaniel Hackett coached Zach Wilson and made him look better than Sean Peyton coached Russell Wilson and made him look. That's just a fact.
To wrap things up, the crew delivered some Overly Direct Takes, including a bold ranking for the Niners' signal-caller and a grim prediction for the NFL's most famous new couple.
PFT CommenterBrock Purdy is a top five quarterback in the NFL
My overly direct take... Brock Purdy this year is a top five quarterback in the NFL. I like it. Top five. I think he's number five in the NFL right now... If he gets to a Super Bowl, I'm gonna say it. Brock Purdy might be elite.
HankTravis Kelce and Taylor Swift are going to break up soon
Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift... we're gonna break up. Allegedly. She's gotta go back out on tour. Travis has got some rehabbing to do with the injury...
At least we still have the bank and the Phillies to keep Max screaming until his eyes well up with tears of joy.
