PMT DB
PMT DB
NFL Week 2: Bears Stink, Chiefs Slide, and the Pinky Bet Returns
Week 2 in the NFL provided exactly the kind of chaos that makes us love and hate this league in equal measure. We had Fastest 2 Minutes, a slate of games that refused to end on time, and some serious soul-searching for a few franchises that thought they were ready for the big time.
Before the guys even got into the games, the shadow of the Pinky Bet loomed large. With the Chiefs and potentially the Texans sitting at 0-2, Big Cat is already feeling the phantom pains of a future surgery.
Big CatI'm eventually going to lose the tip of my pinky on a bet
I'm probably gonna lose a pinky. Eventually. I'm gonna lose a pinky. We're gonna do this show for the next 40 years. I'm gonna do this bet every year for some year. I'm gonna lose the pinky.
The Chicago Bears are Who We Thought They Were
Lions 52, Bears 21. It was an absolute bloodbath in Detroit. Jared Goff looked like a surgical machine, throwing five touchdowns and nearly helping the Lions score a point per play. Meanwhile, the Bears look like they’ve managed to get worse in the fourth year of a supposed rebuild. Big Cat didn't hold back on Ryan Polls, pointing out that top draft picks like Colson Loveland and Luther Burden were essentially non-existent.
Big CatRyan Polls' rebuild of the Chicago Bears is a complete joke
The main culprit is Ryan Polls because we are now in year four of a rebuild... it's absolutely abysmal. Year four of a rebuilding they're somehow worse. Ryan Polls has not had a single Pro Bowler drafted. That's pretty crazy.
While Caleb Williams wasn't the *main* problem, the defense giving up nearly 700 yards in five quarters is a joke. PFT tried to find a silver lining with Rome Odunze, but the vibes in Chicago are officially at rock bottom.
Cowboys/Giants Thriller and Kickers as MVPs
In a game that featured 41 points in the fourth quarter alone, Dak Prescott moved to 14 straight wins against the Giants. Russell Wilson nearly set a career high in passing yards, but the real story was Brandon Aubrey. The man makes 60-yarders look like chip shots, leading PFT to make a bold claim about his hypothetical draft stock.
PFT CommenterBrandon Aubrey could be a first or second-round draft pick if re-drafted
If he entered the NFL draft next year, if somehow he got reclassified back and he wasn't in the NFL and was eligible to be drafted, there would be a team that would take him in the second round. I'm saying he is so much better than any other kicker in the NFL.
The AFC North and the Quarterback Question
In Pittsburgh, the Seahawks defense smothered Aaron Rodgers. It was a bizarre game highlighted by Caleb Johnson literally walking away from a live ball on a kickoff, essentially gifting Seattle a touchdown. Between the injuries and the stagnant offense, PFT is starting to think the Steelers have a specific comfort zone.
PFT CommenterThe Steelers are better when they have a shitty quarterback
I think the Steelers are better when they have a shitty quarterback... I think that they're better when their defense knows that they have to be like impregnable.
Big Cat is even more pessimistic about the future in Pittsburgh, looking at Rodgers' inability to push the ball downfield as a sign that the end might be here.
Big CatAaron Rodgers might be washed
I think they can just give it a little time 'cause I think Aaron Rodgers might not be good anymore. Under pressure, he was a disaster... He might be over.
Crisis in Miami and the 0-2 Club
Things are getting ugly for Mike McDaniel. A players-only meeting after Week 1 followed by a communication breakdown in a loss to the Patriots has the seat feeling extremely hot. Big Cat is already putting a timeline on a potential firing.
Big CatMike McDaniel will be the first NFL head coach fired this season
It feels like it's going to be our first head coach fired this season... the heat on his seat is volcanic at this point because they had a players only meeting after week one.
Big CatIf the Dolphins start 0-5, Mike McDaniel will be fired
I'll make the prediction. If the Dolphins start 0-5, he will be fired. 'cause they play the Bills. They're gonna lose to the Bills in Buffalo. Thursday Night Football. Then they play the Jets... then they play the Panthers. If they lose to the Jets and the Panthers... he's done.
Then there are the Chiefs. Patrick Mahomes and Andy Reed are 0-2 for the first time in forever, losing a rock fight to the Eagles. The offense looks broken, and even Travis Kelce’s improved athleticism couldn't save them from a disastrous mistake late in the game. Zac thinks we might be witnessing the end of an era.
ZacThe Chiefs' Mahomes and Andy Reid dynasty is finished
I just think the dynasty's over. I think Andy Reid and Mahomes dynasty's finished... usually when they pan the camera to Andy Reid, he's got a certain amount of girth... but this time it almost looks a little hollow. It looks a little empty.
Big Cat is desperately rooting for a Texans loss on Monday night just so he doesn't have to put his pinky on the line for the Mahomes dynasty, even if the Texans are the only 0-2 team that actually looks like a contender.
Big CatThe Houston Texans are the only Owen-two team with legitimate Super Bowl aspirations
I was looking at the Owen two teams and the only argument for a team that had legitimate Super Bowl aspirations would be the Houston Texans. Every other team that is Owen two was a dog shit team.
Transitive Property and Who's Back
To wrap things up, the guys looked at the Falcons' dominant defensive performance over the Vikings. It turns out the Packers might be the most terrifying team in the NFC North based on how everyone else is playing.
Big CatThe Green Bay Packers might be really good this year
The Packers might be really, really fucking good... the transitive property game, watching the Falcons demolish the Vikings makes me think the Bears are even worse than I thought... and the Packers, unfortunately, are really, really, really good.
We also got a look at the Falcons' long-con regarding their quarterback room, with PFT theorizing that Kirk Cousins was nothing more than a very expensive distraction.
PFT CommenterThe Falcons signed Kirk Cousins as a smoke screen to draft Michael Penix Jr.
I think that the Falcons when they, they probably signed Kirk Cousins and said, Hey, this is a smoke screen. No one's gonna think that we're gonna draft Michael Penix. So a fall to us. So let's just pay this guy a hundred million dollars. So we get our guy and it worked.
Who's Back of the Week featured the return of boxing, Ken Rosenthal's terrifying death stare on the sidelines, and our new best friends at Twisted Tea.
At least we still have 15 weeks of this to figure out who actually sucks.
