PMT DB
PMT DB
Week 17 Recap, Jameis History, and the Aaron Rodgers Money Conspiracy
Week 17 delivered exactly the kind of chaos we needed to close out the decade. We just watched the 49ers and Seahawks trade blows in an absolute war for the NFC West that came down to an inch at the goal line. While the Niners secured the top seed, the real story might be how Pete Carroll managed the clock. Big Cat has a theory that the delay of game penalty on the one-yard line wasn't just a mistake, but a calculated move to avoid the ghosts of Super Bowl XLIX.
Big CatPete Carroll took a deliberate delay of game to avoid another goal-line mistake with Marshawn Lynch
I actually think conspiracy theory here that Pete Carroll took the delay game on purpose because he didn't want to be stuck in a situation where he screwed up on the one-yard line again with Marshawn Lynch back... Pete Carroll kind of saved himself from himself by backing it up to the 6-yard line.
Even though Seattle came up short, Russell Wilson proved once again why he is the ultimate late-game weapon. Big Cat isn't looking at the box score; he's looking at the guy he wants under center when the season is on the line.
Big CatRussell Wilson is the best quarterback to have with the ball at the end of a game
In terms of quarterbacks I want to have the ball at the end of the game, [Russell Wilson] is my number one. Yeah, he's my number one, even though they didn't score there, he's still my number one because he did everything to get them to score.
On the other side of that matchup, Kyle Shanahan almost coached himself into a disaster by getting too conservative. It felt like he was overcorrecting for his past Super Bowl aggressive tendencies by punting when he should have gone for the throat.
Big CatKyle Shanahan lowered the 49ers' win probability by 19% by punting on fourth and one
Kyle Shanahan you kind of let me down by punting there on fourth and one when your offense is so good... their percentage to win the game went down by 19 percent by punting instead of going I thought they should have gone for it.
History was made in Tampa Bay as Jameis Winston became the founding member of the 30/30 club. A walk-off pick-six to hit 30 touchdowns and 30 interceptions is the most Jameis thing to ever happen. He is a one-of-one athlete, a cartoon character in cleats who provides more entertainment value than almost any other player in the league. Big Cat thinks the market should reflect that, even if the Buccaneers' coaching staff is losing their minds.
Big CatJameis Winston's entertainment value to the NFL is worth over $30 million a year
I actually think that as far as entertainment value goes [Jameis Winston's] worth for the NFL is worth well over 30 million dollars. Yes because of what he delivers to the fans... please give Jameis the bump so we can see him in Sunday night and Monday night all next year.
The Fall of the Patriots and the Rise of the Titans
The Dolphins stunning the Patriots in Foxboro was the shock of the day, forcing New England into a Wild Card matchup against Mike Vrabel and the Titans. While PFT is ready to bury the dynasty right now, Big Cat thinks this is just setting up another classic Patriots fake-out before they inevitably run into the Chiefs.
PFT CommenterThe Titans will beat the Patriots in the Wild Card round
I think I think the Titans take [the Patriots].
Big CatThe Patriots will beat the Titans in the Wild Card round but then lose to the Chiefs
I feel like the [Patriots are] going to roll the Titans and everyone's going to buy back in and then they're going to lose the Chiefs.
Is Aaron Rodgers Broke?
The Packers secured a first-round bye, but Aaron Rodgers looks like a man who would rather be anywhere else. His body language is at an all-time low, and the guys spent a significant amount of time trying to diagnose what's actually wrong in Green Bay. PFT thinks it's the vibes being thrown off by Danica Patrick’s crystal collection, while Big Cat is looking at the financial records.
PFT CommenterDanica Patrick's crystals are the reason Aaron Rodgers' play has declined
I think [Danica Patrick's] crystals have him fucked up. That was my theory. Anika's got the crystals all fucked up.
Big CatAaron Rodgers is playing poorly because he is broke and stressed about money
Is Aaron Rodgers broke? Is that maybe why he's upset because he spent all his money trying to entertain Danica... He would be the most hilarious unexpected athletes end up on the 30 for 30 'Broke'. I actually think that he's being held hostage by somebody... he looks like he's worried about bills.
Despite the misery and the ugly play, the path is set for Green Bay. Big Cat is resigned to the fact that they are going to keep winning games they have no business winning all the way to Miami.
Big CatThe Packers will win 'ugly' and make the Super Bowl
The Packers look terrible in the first half they obviously came in and won... but they're going to fucking go to the Super Bowl. I just feel it in my bones. I just know it. I know they don't have the one seed anymore, but they're going to win ugly games.
Coaching Carousel and College Playoff Blowouts
Freddie Kitchens is gone in Cleveland, and the guys are already missing the content. While the Browns look for their next savior, Big Cat is eyeing a very specific familiar face to bring some professionalism to the Dawg Pound.
Big CatMike McCarthy will be the next head coach of the Cleveland Browns
I think it's going to be [Mike] McCarthy [for the Browns]. Because he looks like McCarthy looks like a Cleveland coach... if Freddy kitchens got a makeover and became slightly more professional, right? That's what you have when you get in my car if Freddy kitchens got a haircut and skip dinner. Yeah, he'd be Mike McCarthy.
Meanwhile, the College Football Playoff semifinals were a tale of two games. Joe Burrow and LSU absolutely dismantled Oklahoma in a game that was over before the first quarter ended. It was so lopsided that Big Cat is ready to petition for a total ban on the Big 12 until they can prove they belong on the same field as the heavyweights.
Big CatThe Big 12 should be banned from the College Football Playoff for a year
I want to do right now here now say that Oklahoma deserves a one-year ban from the college football playoff... the entire Big 12 done out here band for the Big 12 out out. I can't I can't do it.
We also got a classic Trevor Lawrence performance to set up an LSU-Clemson title game that will probably be the loudest event in the history of New Orleans. If Coach O wins it all in the Superdome, the state of Louisiana might actually crown him King.
Happy New Year to all the AWLs, let's get ready for the best month of the year.
