Duke is back to being the worst and perfectly hateable again

Duke is back to being the worst because goddammit, those guys are so hateable and they're right back to where they were. I was nervous... but just that scene choking on senior night against UNC. Those stupid fucking Cameron Crazies that pretend that they're the coolest, best fan base in the world... throwing shit at college players.

College basketball is better when Duke is the villain

College basketball is better when Duke is the villains. So I'm happy for the tournament. I'm excited. Shut everyone up.

John Calipari might have a job at Kentucky for life

I think actually Cal is getting ready to... we have it wrong with the hot seat. His team's playing so well and Kentucky's so exciting. He might get like, can you get a job for the afterlife too? Because he has a job for life.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?