Anyone who owns a ferret is probably a murderer
Ferrets. Because anyone who owns a ferret is probably a murderer, and that's just like pre-crime. We basically created pre-crime by getting rid of ferrets.
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View episodeJay Cutler is the only professional athlete who is treated like a woman
I love how Jay Cutler is the only professional athlete that's treated like a woman, really. Like, honey, you'd be so much better if you'd just smile, babe.
You can't spend more than 12 hours in Canton without getting legally drunk
I mean you can't spend more than 12 hours in Canton without getting legally drunk. I was there last year. It is – it's one of the worst times.
Russell Westbrook will always do the exact opposite of what people tell him to do
Everyone just assumed [Westbrook] was going to go to L.A. And if I've learned anything about Russell Westbrook, if you tell him what he's going to do, he'll just do the exact opposite.
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View profileCollege basketball has five absolutely dominant teams this year
We have five, you could even maybe go to six, just absolutely dominant teams. Michigan, UConn, Duke, Arizona, and Florida that are playing at such an insane level.
Florida can win the national championship because they can shoot threes now
Florida though, I've been talking about Florida for three weeks. They could shoot threes now. They absolutely kicked [Arkansas's]... They just throttle teams. All four of [Duke, Michigan, Arizona, Florida] would be the best team in the previous five years.
Miami of Ohio will make the tournament even if they lose in the conference tournament
I'm saying right now, winning every... If they go undefeated in the conference, that is so hard to do. I think if they go undefeated in the conference and then lose in the conference tournament, I think they will be in.