The Texans got absolutely screwed by penalties against the Chiefs

The first thing can be that the Texans got absolutely screwed by penalties. And the second thing that can also be true is the Chiefs deserve to win this game because they outplayed him... But if you're a Texans fan, you have every right to bitch about that for the next week straight.

Dan Campbell is not a 'winner' until he wins a Super Bowl

I'm just not giving him the label of Dan Campbell winner... He's a good coach, but not a winner. [He needs to win a] Super Bowl. That's what I said the first time.

Patrick Mahomes purposely baits defenders into illegal hits for flags

[Mahomes'] thing where he lets up on purpose to try to get goat players into hitting him is bullshit. It's bullshit. Like you can't, it's so hard for defenders to hit a quarterback in today's NFL... he was scrambling and like almost stood still waiting for a guy to hit him illegally or hit him out of bounds.

Fettuccine Alfredo is fake Italian food.

Alfredo's not real Italian. There's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine. Alfredo's fake Italian. He [Rick Pitino] would maybe do a lemon chicken, maybe do a lemon chicken Piccata. But Alfredo... Cacho e pepe, that's Italian. But there's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine.

The Sixers are a bad team that loses every game Joel Embiid doesn't play

The Sixers suck. The Sixers are a bad team. Embiid's not playing. They lose—the Sixers are back to losing every game that Embiid doesn't play.

My 'dinner simulator' habit of building food orders and not buying them is a sign of good self-control

Instead of going and making myself a snack or making myself food or ordering food, I'll just pull up the apps, Uber Eats... and I'll just like put together an order of what I would order if I were to get something. And then I clear my cart and I go to bed... It's really good self-control.