OJ Simpson was a significantly better football player than he was a person

Say what you will about OJ. But he was a way, way better football player than person. Absolutely. Not even close. Like 2000 yards in 14 games.

The Buffalo Bills have been cursed from returning to the Super Bowl since OJ Simpson committed murder in 1994

I realized after OJ died, the Bills haven't made the Super Bowl since he committed double murder. 1994, the Bills played in the Super Bowl. Summer 94 [the murder happened]. This might be good things for the Bills [now that he's dead].

OJ Simpson is in heaven because they needed a great running back

I got into a little tiff with Jose Canseco online... because when OJ died, I said, RIP to OJ Simpson. Heaven just got a great running back. Jose Canseco was like, wait a second. OJ's not in heaven.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?