Eric Bieniemy only joined the Commanders because he was promised they are getting Lamar Jackson

There might be a little deal behind the scenes with Ron Rivera telling Bieniemy 'Lamar gets franchise tag... if it's not exclusive, oh, we're gonna get Lamar now.' Why would he go to Washington, DC... to go to a starting quarterback, Sam Howell, who started precisely one game?

Dan Snyder will sign Lamar Jackson to a fully guaranteed contract just to spite the other NFL owners

Dan Snyder, out of spite just to fuck over the next owner would love nothing more than to give those two first round picks away and on top of that, throwing a shitload of guaranteed money in a contract extension for Lamar Jackson... it would be a fuck you to those [other owners] that don't want these guaranteed contracts.

Lamar Jackson is losing out on major opportunities by not having an agent

It is crazy Lamar Jackson doesn't have an agent. I know like you can, I'm all for player empowerment, but I feel like he is probably losing out on opportunities without an agent. And what team wa—he has no idea what team wants 'em.

The Sixers are a bad team that loses every game Joel Embiid doesn't play

The Sixers suck. The Sixers are a bad team. Embiid's not playing. They lose—the Sixers are back to losing every game that Embiid doesn't play.

My 'dinner simulator' habit of building food orders and not buying them is a sign of good self-control

Instead of going and making myself a snack or making myself food or ordering food, I'll just pull up the apps, Uber Eats... and I'll just like put together an order of what I would order if I were to get something. And then I clear my cart and I go to bed... It's really good self-control.

Bryce Harper will return to being a beast this season after disrespect from his GM

Bryce Harper's been nothing but good. And Dave Dombrowski disrespecting him like that. Bryce has every right to be upset about that. ... I think he's gonna be a beast this year. He's gonna return to being a beast.