Dirk Koetter is an inherently unmemorable person

Dirk is the guy, you could put me in a chair clockwork orange style and just tape my eyelids open for a day and show me nonstop clips of Dirk Koetter, and I would not remember what he looked like the next day.

The NFL is better when kickers are erratic and unpredictable

We want to see Roberto Aguayo stick around because the NFL is always a better place. When there's a kicker that whenever he lines up, you don't know which way the ball is going to go. Like it might hit the ref in the head and knock him unconscious.

Watching Hard Knocks will lead to drafting a bust running back in your fantasy league

It is also the time of year where you watch Hard Knocks and you fall in love with a guy who's catching everything or the backup running back, and then you draft him in your fantasy league, and he sucks. It's called the Chris Polk.

The Brewers have the World Series sealed

I think the Brewers have this thing sealed up after an insane Monday night where they were just awesome.

There will be no MLB lockout

They'll figure it out. There's too much at stake. They'll figure it out. It's not 1994 anymore. They'll figure it out.

A 24-team College Football Playoff is starting to make sense

I'm starting to grow on it. My problem is, I'm thinking about it in just this year where we actually had parity.