It would have been worse for Peyton Manning to win only one Super Bowl than to have won zero

It actually would have been worse for Peyton [Manning] to have only won one Super Bowl instead of having won zero because he was really, really good for such a long time that if you have one, that trophy looks lonely on your mantle place. You know, you can explain not having any trophies. But if you have one, it's like, well, how come you don't have more?

Every person on the ice for the Stanley Cup celebration should be required to wear skates

I don't like the fact that they roll out a carpet onto the ice. I feel like if you're going to be celebrating something on the ice, it needs to be done by only people wearing ice skates. So like the guys in the tuxes, the girl that comes out to sing the national anthem, they all need to be wearing ice skates. Like respect the sport a little bit.

Draymond Green missed LeBron James' testicles because LeBron is on steroids

Draymond threw a punch directly into the groin and didn't make contact with LeBron James' nuts... steroids, common side effect, shrink the testicles. making them harder to hit, harder to locate. So I think that the fact that Draymond... didn't make contact... that is a major red flag. And if I'm Adam Silver, I'm personally walking a piss cup into the Cavaliers' locker room and making LeBron James urinate into it.

Pigeons are the smartest birds because they live off human trash

Pigeons might be the smartest bird. There is one... they've essentially just over the years been like, Hey, you know where we should live? Right where the people leave their trash. We don't have to hunt for anything. We don't have to go fucking diving for worms and fish... Some guy's going to eat a calzone and not finish it and we're gonna finish it. So pigeons might be the smartest bird.

Barry Bonds could still play in the MLB and take a million walks because of fear

I think of that with Barry Bonds for sure. Barry Bonds I like He could just, he, he could show up and just be awesome and, and take like a million walks. 'cause people would fear him.

American air conditioning is the equivalent of 'Hunter Biden crack' for European visitors

I would imagine air conditioning for Europeans hits like crack. Like the best crack of all. Oh, hunter Biden crack. Yeah. That's like when we go over to, to Spain and we see a nude beach. Like that's, that, that feeling that we get over there is their feeling when they're walking into one of our buildings over here.