Todd Haley and Gregg Williams are the meanest sons of bitches in the world

My biggest takeaway from Hard Knocks is that Todd Haley and Greg Williams combined are the meanest sons of bitches in the world.

Hue Jackson has a future as the Lorne Michaels of comedy football

I actually think [Hue] Jackson has a future as a Lorne Michaels. He's just been putting together the perfect comedy troupe of a football team for the last three years.

Devon Cajuste's belief in the power of crystals and the full moon will be what gets him a spot on the Browns roster

I actually do kind of believe in the crystals, like the harnessing of the crystal power is probably what's going to get [Cajuste] on the team. Either that or the full moon. Once a month, he will give you a hell of a game.

Ohio State moved senior night because it is scared of Michigan

If you're saying, 'Hey, we can't do it for the Michigan game because it's something that's just totally different and separate unto itself,' do it the last home game before that, which would be Northwestern. But that senior night though should be—you'd basically just be saying, 'I'm scared of doing it against Michigan.'

Michigan is closer to 7-5 than a playoff team

If Bryce Underwood doesn't take a massive step forward, this is closer to a seven-five team than a playoff team.

Wisconsin has to win eight games

He's gotta win eight. I think he would tell you he's gotta win eight. Because if you win seven, that means you probably lost to Penn State, Iowa, USC and UCLA or Minnesota, and it's like some of those are not okay.