It only counts as Opening Day if you can skip work and get drunk during the day

I only count it as opening day if you can skip work and get drunk during the day and watch baseball. Otherwise, like a Sunday night, I could do that any other week of the year.

Opening Day should always be on a Monday so everyone can skip work and get drunk together.

You have to have opening day be like a Monday. Everyone can skip work, get drunk. There's a lot of games together. Shout out to Johnny Bench. He was absolutely right. I hate what they've done [with Sunday night games].

Fireball is an acceptable ballpark drink until September 1st

I like to do airplane minis, like the mini bottles of Fireball... It's kind of like you don't wear white after Labor Day. You don't want to be drinking Fireball after like September 1st. After September 1st, you want to lose the flavored whiskey and get like some Jack Daniels or something because it's about a playoff push. So you got to focus. None of this sugary crap.

The Celtics are resetting this season to target Nikola Jokic in 2027

I think the Celtics are basically saying this year we're resetting and then next year maybe Jokic could definitely be in the be in the realm of possibility.

The Kawhi Leonard era with the Clippers was an absolute failure

The Clippers Kawhi era is maybe the most unforgettable or or forgettable, I'm sorry, era of all time. Like they did nothing. Just an absolute tease.

France is playing the World Cup on 'easy mode' and looks unstoppable

France is just playing on easy mode. Like they're not even trying and they're just dummying people... France could have played with nine guys and they probably would've won that game.