My ping pong victory over PFT Commenter is like the Bulls finally beating the Pistons

It's like MJ [Michael Jordan] versus the Pistons, except in this situation, no one got to saw the Pistons beat the Bulls.

The NFL will never allow hot mics on players because coaches are too paranoid

Do you think the NFL is going to let players have a hot mic? It's not the XFL. Do you think Bill Belichick's going to let his team have a hot mic? The NFL is full of coaches that are the most paranoid people in the world. Do you think they're going to be willingly allowing all of their schemes and everything to be just said out loud? No way!

Porn sites are pushing specific genres to collect blackmail dirt on the entire country

I think that the porn sites have been complicit recently... on most major porn sites, they feature heavily the whole stepson-stepdaughter dynamic even if you never click on those videos and watch them, they're pushing those on you. I think that they've been doing that so that now they know that anyone that's been to one of these websites has either accidentally or on purpose clicked on one of those, so they have dirt on everybody in America almost.

The Lions will win the NFC North

I think they're gonna be really good. Are the Lions on Crosby watch? ... I think them and maybe the Cowboys might be on Crosby watch. ... I think they probably will win the NFC North.

The Bears could have a top-five offense even if they miss the playoffs

There's a world where the Bears don't make the playoffs, but they're a top-five offense. And our defense is so bad that I can almost—I would be very upset, but I could deal with it.

The Jaguars could win the AFC South

I think the Jaguars are not getting any respect or talked about a lot. I think they're gonna be really good this year. They could win the South. I think Trevor Lawrence is gonna keep going forward.