The 2016 Pittsburgh Penguins are the softest and worst team to ever win a Stanley Cup

Congrats to Pittsburgh, right? They are probably the softest team to ever win a Stanley Cup... I think that this Pittsburgh Penguin team is probably the worst team to ever win a Stanley Cup. And we don't even know if they won it. That's how bad they are, that we have no confidence that they're going to win.

The Stanley Cup is the greatest trophy in sports and every trophy should be drinkable

Every time the Stanley Cup champion is crowned, it reminds me that it is the greatest trophy in all of sports, and it's not even close. Every single trophy you should be able to drink out of.

Phil Kessel will celebrate a Stanley Cup win by eating whatever he wants all summer, possibly filling the Cup with queso or hot dog water

Phil Kessel, though, you think he eats now. If he's a Stanley Cup champion, you can eat whatever you want for the rest of the summer... I wouldn't be shocked if that was a story that came out in a couple months or, like I said, just some hot dogs. Like some good old hot dog water and some boiled hot dogs.

The Celtics are resetting this season to target Nikola Jokic in 2027

I think the Celtics are basically saying this year we're resetting and then next year maybe Jokic could definitely be in the be in the realm of possibility.

The Kawhi Leonard era with the Clippers was an absolute failure

The Clippers Kawhi era is maybe the most unforgettable or or forgettable, I'm sorry, era of all time. Like they did nothing. Just an absolute tease.

France is playing the World Cup on 'easy mode' and looks unstoppable

France is just playing on easy mode. Like they're not even trying and they're just dummying people... France could have played with nine guys and they probably would've won that game.