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Win
HankHank

The Celtics vs. Nets series is basically over after Game 1

Obviously, the Celtics lost. That first half, though. They had a great first half. They had a chance. Kemba Walker played terribly in the second half, and the series is basically over. Sweep. Maybe gentlemen's sweep.

The Nets won the series 4-1, which is a 'Gentlemen's Sweep.'

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Void
May 24, 2021
#27919
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Phil Mickelson's victory is the 'Burning Man for Gen Xers'

Standing next to Phil Mickelson, like what you saw in the 18th hole, that's Burning Man for Gen Xers. That's as close as they'll get to taking drugs and going to a music festival and discovering their inner selves for three days.

Subjective comparison of fan demographics and cultural impact.
Loss
May 24, 2021
#9488
HankHank

Brooks Koepka would have won the PGA Championship by 15 strokes if his knee was healthy

[Brooks Koepka's] knee is hurting him, and he wasn't able to get all the way low to read putts, and the putter is what kind of killed him today and this weekend. So Ipso facto, he probably would have won this tournament by 15 strokes if his knee was okay.

Koepka finished tied for second, two strokes behind Mickelson. There is no way to verify he would have won by 15 strokes.
Void
May 24, 2021
#27920
Big CatBig Cat

James Harden is the 'straw that stirs the drink' for the Nets

He's [James Harden] the guy who keeps it going because when he was out, they were a different team. He's a straw that stirs the drink.

Opinion on player value to a specific team structure.

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HankHank

Tom Brady helping Mike Macdonald prepare for the Patriots would be a huge slap in the face to the New England region.

That would be egregious if that was true. I don't believe it is true. But if it were, that would be unforgivable. Not unforgivable. That would be a, a blemish, a big blemish. Big time. It'd be a slap in the face of the whole region.

Subjective opinion on how a hypothetical rumor would be perceived.
Void
HankHank

Jayson Tatum is playing cute by claiming he found out about the Jaylen Brown trade on social media.

I'm sure he knew that he was on the trading block and he didn't know specifically when he got traded and he found out just like everyone else... all Brad Stevens, Jaylen Brown, they talked about how, you know, he was gonna be on the trading block and they were gonna try and move him. So I'm sure Jayson Tatum was also aware of that. But in terms of, he's probably playing a little, a little cutesy there where like no one specifically told him, 'Hey, this is the trade.' He found out like everyone else. But I'm sure he was not surprised and fully aware what the plan was.

Subjective interpretation of Tatum's PR framing.
Open
HankHank

The Celtics have another major move coming following the Jaylen Brown trade

There's something going on here. I I said it to Max on the boat yesterday. I was like, Jalen Brown was getting traded. I could, I could just feel it. I could feel it coming... I feel like the Paul George thing is, there's the, like, they might be doing another trade. There's another move coming.

The trade just happened in the fictional 2026 timeline provided; further moves are pending.