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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Bet on every away team playing on Christmas Day because the home teams are distracted by family in town.

I saw the reminder pop up in her calendars for next year on Christmas. Bet on all the away teams. Right. Because it's gonna be like, because we have a, a family in town for the home teams... Sample size of two, which it's Iron Cloud.

All three away teams won on NFL Christmas Day 2025: Cowboys 30-23 over Commanders, Vikings 23-10 over Lions, and Broncos 20-13 over Chiefs. PFT's theory of betting all away teams on Christmas Day was vindicated perfectly.

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Void
Apr 2, 2025
#3758
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Under the NFL's new overtime rules, you should choose to kick if you win the coin toss.

Now we're gonna have to recalibrate because you win the coin toss. You don't want the ball first. Correct? 'cause then you want to know if you need to go for two on a touchdown.

Strategically, many analytics experts agree that knowing what you need (FG or TD) and having the ability to go for two to win makes the second possession superior.
Open
Apr 2, 2025
#3759
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The NFL will eventually ban the Tush Push.

It's gaining momentum though. That's the problem is now they're up to 16 teams that voted to ban it... I I feel like at some point it's gonna be banned.

The NFL has not banned the tush push. A May 2025 vote fell short (22 of 24 needed). No 2026 proposal submitted. Still legal.
Void
Apr 2, 2025
#26511
Big CatBig Cat

The NFL's use of the 'player safety' label is almost always a facade for other league interests.

I'm tired of them pretending it's player safety and then being like, let's add another game or add more overtime. It's not player safety. It's never, whenever they say player safety, it's never player safety.

This is a subjective assessment of the league's motivations.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.