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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Both Final Four games will be decided by five points or fewer

Both [games] are gonna be within five... I think they're both gonna be close games. America's the real winner. That's my take.

Neither Final Four game was within 5 points: Michigan 91-73 Arizona (18 pts), UConn 71-62 Illinois (9 pts).

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Apr 2, 2026
#30123
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles front office and coaching staff authorized a hatchet job against Jalen Hurts

There are some people in that still work for the Eagles in the front office and the coaching ranks of the Philadelphia Eagles that authorized a hatchet job against their starting quarterbacks. Not just your [Kevin Patullo]s, not just the guys that used to work there... There's some guys inside those walls that gave the go ahead and the green light to run a clear hit piece against the guy.

The article in question contains many anonymous quotes from within the organization, though 'authorization' is an interpretation of the reporting.
Loss
Apr 2, 2026
#30124
Big CatBig Cat

The Eagles are running a coordinated attack on Jalen Hurts to prepare for moving on from him

This is a coordinated attack... they're trying to get ready, get everyone ready for a move that's coming to get rid of Jalen Hurts. Because it did feel like a, 'Hey, we're not, we're getting everyone ready in the mindset.' We're basically giving you ammo so when this happens, you could say, 'Aha, it was because of all this.'

The Eagles did not move on from Hurts immediately following this article; he remained their starter for the foreseeable future.
Loss
Apr 2, 2026
#30125
HankHank

AJ Brown will be traded to the New England Patriots

[AJ Brown is] gone no matter what... New England. [In my] unbiased mind, he's still gone.

AJ Brown was not traded to the Patriots in the immediate aftermath of these rumors.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.