The Bears defense is elite and can beat anyone

This Bears defense can beat anyone. [The 20-0 halftime lead] feels like a pivotal era in the Bears history where it's like everything's going to be good from this point forward.

Ben Roethlisberger is bad now because he's too skinny

He's bad now that he's skinny. He doesn't know how to operate without all that extra padding around him. He just drops back, and since he doesn't have that padding, he's used to defensive ends just hitting him and bouncing off him or just being absorbed by his fat.

The Ravens are going to win the AFC North

The Ravens do look like a good football team. John Harbaugh is a week one gangster. Yeah, they're going to win that division.

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.